Coffee Morning Reminiscence
by 1Thunderfire
Summary: Looking forward to the fourth Super Smash Bros. tournament, Luigi and Jigglypuff think back upon their experiences as Smashers and their friendship, all while enjoying refreshments at that most cosiest of places, Brewster's Café.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi there! I should have been working on my other stories but I really fancied doing this one! It's just a nice, domestic kind of story involving Luigi and Jigglypuff over their time in the Smash Tournament. And don't we always tell stories over a mug of tea or coffee? So make yourself a brew and have a read.**

* * *

 **Coffee Morning Reminiscence: Part 1**

Smashville: what a lovely place it was to be in! While the air was crisp and cold, it was nevertheless pleasant to take a stroll around the village before getting down to the business of the tournament once again.

Some had questioned her validity upon remaining in the tournament- was she even relevant anymore they dared ask? Pah! She was one of the Original Twelve! Not only was she valid but she was most certainly relevant: had she not made appearances outside of the tournament during this time? She had indeed. Perhaps they ought to extend that question to Ness and Captain Falcon, other members of the Original Twelve. The boy had only one adventure after all, a significant adventure to be sure, but only that one adventure even if its tale was being told once again. And as for Captain Falcon, he wasn't even a hero! He was… a racing driver. A bounty hunter. And when did he last do even those things? But her mind was digressing and she would not allow such things to taint her lovely day so far. And anyway, neither would they be going any time soon since they were of the Original Twelve. In any case, it would be nice to meet up with them again as she was doing today with another fellow Smasher.

She adjusted the rose in her straw hat and headed for the welcome warmth of Brewster's Café which was now just ahead of her. Hopefully her companion wouldn't be too long in arriving else she would become quite bored with waiting.

Ah, Brewster's. She had spent many an hour here in between matches, training, events and so forth. As expected, the place was busy with many rosy-cheeked people treating themselves to hot drinks and a nice slice of cake. She always liked this cosy atmosphere with the chequered, cushioned seats and the rustic appearance. The pigeon proprietor of the place noticed the pink puffball Pokémon and gave a cheery wave: Smashers were among his favourite customers since their presence always guaranteed even more customers. Busy with his chores, Brewster pointed towards the corner. It seemed that her companion had already arrived. But then, he was known for being quite punctual.

"Hey, Jigglypuff," Luigi smiled as she sat down and made herself comfortable. "Long time no see!"

"Long time no see yourself, Luigi," Jigglypuff returned pleasantly, shaking his outstretched hand. "How are things? I hear you and Mario had another adventure recently. Pi'illo Island wasn't it?"

"Yeah. It was supposed to be one of those diplomatic visits but you know how they often turn out. It wasn't Bowser who started the trouble in the first place though; it was this weird bat thing called Antasma…"

As Luigi regaled Jigglypuff with his tale of dream-hopping, giant battles and Pi'illo saving, drinks that Luigi had ordered before arrived for them consisting of a large cappuccino and a pot of elderflower and blackcurrant tea.

"Why thank you," Jigglypuff said as she took a sip of her favourite brew from a willow teacup. "But what made you think that I hadn't switched to a new favourite since the last time?"

"Because when you get here, you always say that the first thing you want to do is go to Brewster's and have a pot of elderflower and blackcurrant tea," Luigi said knowingly while satiating his thirst with Brewster's finest coffee. "Anyway, how have things been at your end?"

"Oh, the usual near apocalyptic disasters involving the legendaries and silly beings who try to control them," said Jigglypuff with the air of having been there, done that. "So we've had those concerns to address. But even better, I've been working as an assistant for Guildmaster Wigglytuff!"

"Oh yeah, I remember him. Really great explorer if I remember you telling me."

"He's an inspiration!" Jigglypuff sighed longingly. "Maybe I'll set up my own guild one day, seeking treasure and adventures and all that. Who knows? It's been really great at the moment and it sounds as if it's been great for you too."

"Yep," Luigi grinned. "People are finally starting to recognise and appreciate me. I think Mario might have had a hand in that though he swears that he hasn't done anything of the sort. Still, I appreciate it anyway." Jigglypuff smiled at that. Luigi had done plenty of things worthy of recognition and all he asked for was to be remembered alongside his brother. Things were starting to look up at last.

There was a moment's companionable silence as the pair sat back and observed their surroundings. Once or twice people glanced their way before hurriedly speaking again with their neighbours. Names were written down and gold passed hands. Here and there, the notion of collecting trophies was mentioned along with complaints that collecting said trophies often took a very long time.

"You know, I can't believe that the Smash Tournament has come round again," said Jigglypuff turning back towards Luigi. "It doesn't seem like a very long time since we began the first one does it? How different it is now with all these new Smashers, items and locations. It makes the old one seem very basic. A lot has happened since then it seems. Remember the day that we met?" Jigglypuff giggled at the thought of the memories. "It all seems very strange now doesn't it?"

"How can I forget?" Luigi said with a raised eyebrow. "We've been there since the beginning, the original Smash Bros. tournament…"

* * *

"I don't know why you're so nervous, little bro," Mario said conversationally as he and Luigi finished signing the documents that made them official Smashers. "You're going be fighting these other guys… and me come to think of it at some point. You're a pretty good fighter so you're not going to have loads of problems there. So I'm pretty sure that talking to someone isn't going to be much of a problem."

"Yeah, well, er, I'm just not sure," Luigi mumbled. "Practically everyone knows you; you've got it easy."

"Your problem is that you lack confidence, Luigi," Mario stated with the weariness that comes with saying the same thing on a very frequent basis. "I keep telling you you'll be _fine_."

"Mmm."

"Look, just try and talk to someone, OK? I'm going to do some catching up with Link and see what's what in Hyrule and tell him why the Mushroom Kingdom is obviously better." Mario's eyes gleamed with the pleasure that came from taunting Link. "It'll be good to get to know everyone since I don't think this tournament will be a one-off. It could become pretty popular. Anyway, I'll see you about later."

Luigi shoved his hands in his pockets and groaned inwardly while Mario jaunted off to meet up with the other Smashers and no doubt establish rivalries. Sure, it was fine for Mario to say such things but Luigi wasn't exactly brimming with confidence; he never was. Despite helping rescue Peach on several occasions alongside Mario, people just never seemed to acknowledge him and downright forgot him. Sometimes they could be pretty rude about it since Luigi didn't exactly match up to the usual image of a hero. Such things did not make one easy-going. What difference would there be here? They'd probably be able to beat him in one fell swoop anyway.

"WAH!"

Luigi was knocked aside by something that immediately made him think of a giant, pink marshmallow. It didn't hurt as such since it felt quite soft, but it had taken him by surprise.

"Whoops! Er, sorry," the round figure said. "Didn't notice you there. Blame Pikachu; he was chasing me. I think he's gone annoying that person in the weird suit thingy now. I've never seen anyone like that before. And all these other people look strange but I suppose they also seem familiar in a way. Maybe I'll consider via Types. The suit person's probably a Steel-Type and maybe that green thing with the long tongue's a Dragon-Type or something. Or maybe not. It's going to take a while to get used to things around here."

"Um, sorry," said Luigi seeing that this creature didn't appear to be getting round to introducing itself. "I never met someone like you. What are you?"

He immediately knew he had said the wrong thing when the pink thing puffed itself up like a balloon and said: "Oi! What are you? That's very rude! Hmph! I'll flatten you in the battlefield and yank at that moustache if you say anything like that again!"

"S-sorry," Luigi mumbled, flattening himself against the wall away from this thing's anger. "It's generally not an issue where I come from, er, the Mushroom Kingdom. If we don't know, it's better to ask rather than risk causing offence by getting their species wrong. S-sorry. That was my mistake." The puffball appeared to take his word and returned to her normal size.

"Well, I guess you didn't know, so I suppose I can accept your apology," she said. "I shouldn't blow up like that anyway, metaphorically and literally speaking of course. Things work differently where I come from. I'm a Jigglypuff and a Pokémon."

"Huh, so…?"

"Just call me Jigglypuff," the Pokémon said quickly. "Pikachu's a Pokémon as well in case you didn't know. Much more into the heroics than I am. Are you into the heroics? I suppose you're into the heroics as well. Now I feel out of place. I'm just an ordinary Pokémon really."

"Actually, not that many people see me as a hero really," Luigi said glumly. "Compared to my bro, I'm just not seen as all that important really even though I try to do my fair share in an adventure. So yeah, you're not really alone when it comes to feeling out of place."

Jigglypuff thought this over to herself.

"Well then, perhaps we can be out of place together, eh?"

Luigi gave a small smile for the first time. "Sure. Why not?"

"Great! Except you haven't told me your name yet."

"Huh? Oh, I'm Luigi."

"Luigi? OK, then. Hey, shall we see the others? Truth to be told, I only know Pikachu out of this lot. I haven't talked to any of the others yet."

"Well, at least I can help you there. I came here with a couple of friends and my- _Mario! What are you doing?!_ "

There was a resounding cheer as the unofficial fighting match took place and held its interest with Mario currently holding Link in a headlock and having even disarmed him of the Master Sword. Yoshi was especially elated at this: that Link had thought he was some sort of horse. The cheek of it. He might well have carried people about including Mario on a few occasions but he certainly wasn't a horse!

"Had enough yet?" Mario smirked. Damn, he was just too good at times.

"Never!" Link gasped. "The Hero of Time does not submit!"

"The Mushroom Kingdom is better than Hyrule. Say it."

"Damn you!"

"Princess Peach is more beautiful than Princess Zelda."

"You little sh-!"

" _OK! What's going on here?!"_

Everybody suddenly stopped what they were doing and pretended that they were examining their surroundings still. The Smash Mansion was not the spectacle that it would later become to be. While the later version had pictures plastered all along the walls of the Smashers and of battles that were especially fantastic and awe-inspiring or, in some cases, happened to be a rather hilarious shot, the walls were considerably bare for the time being, with just a plant pot or two sitting in the corners. The extravagant baths and Jacuzzis had not yet been installed and the Training Room was basic to say the least. Neither were the carpets purple and plush as per Master Hand's particular tastes; they couldn't afford those just yet. But these were early days and it was to be hoped that the Smash Mansion would improve greatly considering they were going to be living here for a couple of months or at least, a couple of months out of their ordinary time zones.

"Well?" the floating, disembodied hand demanded. "Who's going to offer an explanation? Why is this fracas taking place in the atrium that I just happened to have painted?"

"We were practising," Mario said, thinking fast. "And showing the others some useful techniques."

"Yeah," Link agreed while massaging his neck. "I think some good things were learnt today. I've certainly learnt some good skills." There was a general chorus of mumbled agreements.

"Really? Well, good to hear. But in future, I would like all fighting to take place in the Training Room or in the challenges I may set you or on the field! UNDERSTAND?" There was much frantic nodding. "Or I'll think of some creative punishments. Or set Crazy Hand on you if I'm feeling particularly peeved. Oh yes, and I wanted to introduce these things called Final Smashes but my minions, er, the Mr Saturns, haven't got it right yet. Too much coffee I'll bet. The first match will be tomorrow between Mario and Link by the way so I look forward to seeing these, ah, _techniques_. That is all."

"He looks similar to you," Jigglypuff said once Master Hand left and everybody else looked at each other somewhat sheepishly.

"Mario. My brother," Luigi groaned with sheer embarrassment.

"Hey, you'll have to fight him at some point won't you?"

"Yeah…" Luigi wasn't looking forward to that at all. Surely everyone knew that Mario was a better fighter than he was?

"Oh, yes!" Master Hand quickly zipped back in the room. "And if anyone touches my dolls, er, plushies, they will die. That is all!"

Luigi and Jigglypuff looked at each other.

"There's going to be a lot of weird stuff happening here, isn't there?" Jigglypuff asked.

"Yup."

* * *

"It took a while to get used to all that, I'll admit," said Jigglypuff.

"Not as weird as the later ones though," said Luigi. "When we got more Smashers. That business with Mr Game and Watch and the custard tarts is not something I want repeating."

"Kirby and Yoshi were fine about it though," Jigglypuff remembered. "They're like natural hoovers."

"Yeah, that's true."

As people came in and out of the café, Luigi and Jigglypuff caught snatches of conversation concerning tiers i.e. how would the tiers be arranged? Who would be at the bottom? Was it worth forming bets around such tiers? Would Meta Knight be in his own tier class again? Luigi rolled his eyes at this conversation and made a noise of disapproval.

"I really don't know why everyone is obsessed with the issue of tiers," he muttered, "we've all got an equally viable chance to win and do our best. Sometimes we have our good days, sometimes our bad days. We try to shake up our strategies and every match is a little different. You can't just lump us together in some sort of hierarchy and say, 'whoa, he's rubbish because he's not as speedy' or say 'hey, that guy's awesome because his up smash is super-powerful'. It isn't fair on the rest of us and I doubt they'd like to be judged in the same way."

"Tell me about it," Jigglypuff sighed. She had, of course, heard this conversation before. But even she was miffed at the fact that when they launched the Brawl tournament, she suddenly went from belonging to the top tier to somehow being chucked right down to the bottom tier and she really didn't have a clue why.

Luigi took a swig from his coffee. "I hate tiers."

* * *

" _Twelfth?! They put me in last place?!"_

Luigi stared at the tier list, hung up in the Meeting Room, utterly aghast.

"But we've barely even started the tournament yet," he moaned. "We've not even done the first week yet. We haven't had the chance to prove ourselves properly yet and they go and shove me in last place." He sighed heavily. "I suppose it's not too surprising. People rarely show confidence in me anyway. Where else am I supposed to be but last?"

There were mutterings of approval or disapproval from the other Smashers as well.

Pikachu kept looking up at the list hardly daring to believe that he had been placed first, _first,_ of all places. He was just a Pokémon who had happened to get a very lucky break. He tried not to look too smug at this. You could say it was a shocking result that had electrified the audience.

"Seventh?" Mario muttered. "I've beaten Bowser so many times I could do it with my eyes shut and I've been placed seventh?"

"Eleventh?! Come on!" Link yelled. "I'm the Hero of Time! How is this even possible? Still, at least I've not been placed dead last I guess…."

"Sixth?" said Jigglypuff. "Well, slap-bang in the middle. It's much better than I expected."

"I'd have thought Kirby would have been first," Samus said, "since it's your people who started all this in the first place."

"What do you mean 'my people?' At least I'm second." (At least until Melee in which case Kirby was unceremoniously booted to last place. Even after the pipsqueak Pichu who was pretty useless really. He took it very hard. Very hard indeed.)

"Cheer up, bro," said Mario once the meeting was disbanded and had made its way towards the Smash Mansion's bar to either celebrate, reflect upon things or simply drown their sorrows. "This list doesn't mean anything. It's just been cobbled together by a bunch of analysts who think they know everything about us and think they know what they're talking about. Tiers don't mean anything once you start racking up the points and victories."

" _Eleventh!"_

"Shut up and drink your milk, Link."

"They must have had a good reason for choosing those positions though," Luigi groaned as he flopped onto the nearest comfy seat. "They must think I'm so weak..."

"Come off it, Luigi." Why could he never seem to convince his brother that he wasn't weak? Mario felt at times that he failed as an older brother even if, as his twin, he was only older by a matter of hours. "Do you really think you'd be in this tournament if you were weak? Or be able to defend the Mushroom Kingdom?"

"He's right," said Jigglypuff who joined their table after ordering drinks. "And besides, this could just be a strategy to make rivals among us or something. I wouldn't put it past Master Hand."

"Yeah," Mario frowned. How did a random puffball Pokémon get placed above him? That grated indeed. "Best not to take any notice of it. I'm sure that the people will forget any notion of tiers once the tournament is well and truly under way."

"Yeah, right," Luigi groaned, running a hand through his hair. "This will judge us from the very start. People will judge us solely from this list as if we had some preliminary fights before coming here. They'll wonder what would be the point of voting for those in the lower tiers when they can just go straight for the higher tier people."

"I don't think people will be that judgemental," said Mario somewhat hopefully, "you might be surprised."

Luigi grunted and took a deep draught of the beer placed in front of him. Mario shook his head. His brother's confidence, often low at best, would have taken a serious knocking indeed. And even if Mario said about ignoring the notion of tiers, Mario himself wasn't best pleased at being placed seventh.

Mario gazed at the other Smashers. The tier list had definitely shaken their spirits a bit and consequently, drinks were desired. Pikachu and Kirby were generous enough not to boast about their good fortune and instead decided to have a game of darts in which it was universally agreed they were awful at what with having stubby, little arms. Yoshi moved to the next table to avoid being hit and concentrated upon matters at hand which involved a large pineapple.

"This isn't fair on you guys," Jigglypuff sympathised. "I mean, you're heroes! I'm not exactly a hero. You must have done plenty of fighting. Can't we just get rid of the tier list or something? It really doesn't make any difference to me and I'll bet a couple of the other Smashers in here will be glad to see it go."

"It would probably be for the best," Mario agreed. "Luigi, slow down, that stuff's stronger than back at home. He's a bit of a lightweight really when it comes to alcohol," he explained to Jigglypuff who was sipping an alcoholic Berry Juice. "And I don't fancy carrying him back to bed tonight."

"I heard that," Luigi mumbled. "I'm not that much of a lightweight." He pulled his hat down more securely. "Maybe it'll be better in the morning. I guess we'll get over it and no-one will give a damn about it. It'll be alright tomorrow."

Deciding that that would be the end of the conversation tonight, the trio made themselves comfortable and began talking about other things. Mario and Luigi were particularly interested to hear about Kanto, a region in Jigglypuff's world in which humans similar to the brothers (though obviously without the special powers) captured Pokémon in little balls and held battles which other Pokémon and their 'Trainers'.

"Weird," said Mario. "It just seems strange to me that there could be that many humans, never mind the whole capturing thing, no offence. I doubt we see another human like ourselves from one month to the next apart from Peach. But the whole capturing thing seems a bit… immoral if you ask me."

"There are advantages," said Jigglypuff, "but it may be hard for you to understand. It's a Pokémon thing."

"I think I get the whole Type set-up at least," said Mario.

"Well, you could be a Fire and Fighting-Type, bro," Luigi chuckled, his mood considerably improved. "The Toads would be Grass-Types perhaps. And maybe I could be-"

"Pffffff! Hey, where's the noob? The last place loser? Let's see how low you are!"

"So much for not mentioning the tiers thing..." Jigglypuff whispered.

Captain Falcon was a nice, if overly loud and hammy, guy most of the time. However, when he had a few too many, he wasn't the most pleasant of characters to be around. The bar went quiet. It would have been even more awkward, perhaps, if there was not some nice music playing in the background. It may have also been averted, perhaps, if there were a few more sober people in the room.

Link hiccuped. "Not me. He's over, thingy, there."

Luigi stood up, eyes narrowed, coldly staring at the bounty hunter in a way that made Mario shiver and hope that he would never see such a stare again.

There was some polite applause and cheering from some of the Smashers and Smash Mansion attendants including Mr Saturns, Alloys, Hotheads, Cuccos, Uniras and more.

"Shouldn't we sort this out?" Pikachu squeaked to Kirby. "If we are meant to be top tier?"

"Probably," said Kirby. He threw his last dart only for it to hit the floor. "But I doubt they want us interfering."

"Let's settle this man to man!" Captain Falcon bellowed to the sound of more cheering. "Or are you not man enough to even do that?"

Mario stood up but Luigi pushed him back down without even looking. Mario wondered if the drinks Luigi had were rather too strong although he seemed to be standing well enough without the slightest wobble. Still, at least he was standing up for himself which couldn't be a bad thing really.

"Luigi, this is a bad idea!" he hissed.

"You don't think I could beat him?"

"Well, of course you could but-"

"Right then."

"I thought I was supposed to be the reckless one," Mario sighed. "Then again, I'd be pretty annoyed at Falcon if he said that to me."

"Mother of Mew, male Pokémon are like this as well," Jigglypuff huffed.

Captain Falcon zoomed forwards faster than anyone had predicted although Luigi managed to leap to one side and dodge the next attack. He launched several green fireballs in the bounty hunter's direction causing him to yelp and slur something about cheating. He kept trying to attack Luigi though Luigi constantly slipped out of his range and occasionally punched him back.

The noise was getting louder along with an inevitable chanting of "FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!" Mario eventually grabbed Luigi while Samus had the unfortunate job of holding down Captain Falcon. Jigglypuff, worrying that Master Hand would come along at any moment to see what the hell all the commotion was, saw only one solution to the whole problem.

Pikachu saw what she was about to do and desperately sought an escape route.

Jigglypuff began to sing.

" _~Jigggggaaaalypuuuuff, Jigga-lyyyyyyy-alyyyyy-puuuuufff~"_

Tiredness immediately washed over everybody in the room and soon there was no escaping the soporific effects of the song. Soon people began to slump in their chairs while others, who had been standing, quickly sank to the floor and curled up. Sleep came to most people very quickly and those who hadn't fallen asleep straight away did not resist very long.

" _~Jigggggaaaalypuuuuff, Jigga-lyyyyyyy-alyyyyy-puuuuufff~"_

Captain Falcon had conked out straight away and Luigi followed not so long afterwards being rather susceptible to sleep (as was especially determined in a much later adventure). Mario valiantly tried to resist but soon enough he slumped next to Luigi and began mumbling about spaghetti and ravioli.

Everybody in the bar was now deep asleep. Pikachu popped back in the room and breathed a sigh of relief that he had escaped in time.

"I suppose things were getting a little out of hand," he said.

"Too right," she fumed. "And now you're going to help me take down these stupid tier lists."

"But-"

"Just do it, Pikachu."

* * *

When Master Hand wandered into the Meeting Room the next morning to inspect that the wallpaper hadn't started peeling, he noticed a gap on the wall. He was quite sure there had been a poster there the other day, but he was a busy guy, he couldn't be expected to remember everything now could he?

Feeling cheerful, he put up some motivational posters instead and went on his way, whistling completely out of tune.

* * *

"Falcon was very apologetic the next day though," said Luigi. "He was practically begging me to forgive him. Of course I had to in the end… after I completely thrashed him at Hyrule Castle of course."

"It was somewhat awkward though when you were put in a team though," Jigglypuff pointed out.

"Yeahhhhhh… but then Samus and Kirby had been arguing the other day and things would probably have gone better for them if they weren't trying to grab glory for themselves. It was unlucky though, getting blown up by a Bob-omb like that."

"Indeed. And poor Kirby was so distraught by the tier list for Melee."

"I'd love to know who comes up with these things so I can then delete all their data," Luigi frowned. "And then Meta Knight in Brawl just completely killed it. Maybe that's why we haven't had any prior tier information yet."

"Do you think we'll have another one for this tournament?" Jigglypuff asked.

"Who knows?" Luigi shrugged. "There's so many Smashers this time round they might decide not to bother. Though I don't think any of us could bear it if Duck Hunt Duo was placed at the top or something..."

As a waitress served the pair Brewster's Speciality Chocolate and Caramel Tarts, they listened in on other conversations going on around them. One in particular said with a loud whisper: "Do you reckon Luigi will win again by doing absolutely nothing?"

"Shh! Not so loud! He's about two tables away."

"Oh, don't tell me you're planning on doing that again!" Jigglypuff frowned as Luigi gave a wide grin. He spread his arms with an air of innocence.

"It's worked for the last three tournaments so far. I just… respond to the natural circumstances and situations that I happen to be in that's all."

"But seriously," Jigglypuff groaned theatrically. "When anyone else tries it in the practice matches, they are immediately battered out of the ring! And when everyone tries to do nothing at the same time as you, you still win! How is that even possible?"

"Hmm, I wish I knew," Luigi said thoughtfully whilst stirring his coffee. "It happens at home as well with the parties. Every single time. And I even managed it with a couple of Mario Kart 8 balloon battles."

"What. Surely that isn't, well, fair, right?"

"Oh, I don't do it all the time," Luigi assured the Pokémon. "Only when I'm pretty sure that such a thing can work. And it's fun watching them trying to do the same thing and failing." Luigi smiled.

"Yeah," Luigi continued. "Good times, good times…"

* * *

The first time that Luigi had won a match by doing absolutely nothing was a complete accident. His pleas to postpone the match because he was feeling nothing short of atrociously ill had fallen upon deaf ears and he had been booted to Kongo Jungle for a 1-stock match with Fox.

"Come on, fight back you coward!" Fox yelled as he pushed the plumber off the edge. Luigi just managed to grab onto the ledge. If he had been a better state of mind to think, he would have objected to being called a coward. He risked his life back in the Mushroom Kingdom like Mario; who said that he had to be utterly fearless about it?

"Do I look like I'm in any condition to fight?" Luigi asked weakly. Just one day off, Master Hand. Was that too much to ask for?

"Well, at least I'll give the audience something to remember!" Fox declared.

He then used Fire Fox, presumably with the idea of falling down with a cool pose before knocking Luigi off. Unfortunately for Fox, he somehow lost his footing on the platform and plummeted to the dark depths below.

"GAME SET!" the announcer cried.

"Wha-? I won?" Luigi groaned. With this realisation, he thought that it would be a good idea to pull himself back up. "But I didn't even do anything." This, nevertheless, had sent the audience wildly cheering and immediately analysing the strategy.

"Minimal movement to preserve energy, throwing the opponent off guard by obfuscating weakness, etc. etc. You couldn't do it every time but damn, I wish I'd placed a bet on him!"

"Kinda short isn't it? I paid good cash for this!"

"Actually, it was a free match."

"Oh."

"I demand a rematch!" Fox fumed once they were back at the Smash Mansion. Everybody was gathered in the lounge except Mario and Yoshi who had overrun on their Break the Targets challenges with that 'just one more time' mentality. Everybody was listening with great interest.

"Actually, he won fair and square," Jigglypuff said reasonably. "You were the one who made such an amateurish mistake!"

"That could happen to anyone!" Fox protested.

"I wouldn't have that problem," said Jigglypuff. Talk about a shock result though. "But anyway, Luigi didn't use any forbidden techniques or items or anything like that. He just didn't actually fight back. That means we've got the Pacifist bonus now though!" The others nodded. They had wondered how on earth they would get that bonus during the course of normal battles. Now it could be ticked off the Bonus Bingo Card at last.

"Is anyone going to back me on this?" Fox grumbled. He was not one to let go of a grudge quickly.

"OK then," said Captain Falcon. "Super Smash Bros is about fighting, about showing us your moves, not about, well, doing nothing. You got to show the audience something, otherwise, well, what's the point?" He sat back and beamed at this contribution.

"Exactly! Thank you, Falcon! Now about that rematch-"

"Er, seeing as you haven't noticed, Luigi is a bit too weak to fight at the moment!" Jigglypuff said indignantly on her friend's behalf. He looked nearly as green as his shirt.

"He won't get stronger if he doesn't fight." Fox dismissed Jigglypuff's words with a wave. Jigglypuff suddenly expanded very large much to the others' alarm and frantic gestures.

"You're not paying attention!" she snapped. "What I'm trying to say is-"

"What a spectacle! What a brilliant match that was!"

Jigglypuff quickly deflated as Master Hand came floating in. Everyone else sat a little straighter except Luigi who was trying not to feel especially ill.

"Genius!" Master Hand boomed. "I wish I could actually applaud you properly but as you are no doubt aware, you need another hand to do that kind of thing properly. Anyway, I found myself very intrigued by this notion, the notion of being able to win a fighting match _without actually fighting at all!_ "

"But he didn't do anything!" Fox seethed.

"Just as well I recorded it really," Master Hand continued without really listening. "The audience loved it. It could become a thing. Like a promotional thing. Of course, it couldn't be done all the time; you're a Smasher for a reason, Luigi, but I like it. Anyway, Fox, you were the one who fell off the ledge, so you really can't complain too much. You've won quite a few matches anyway."

"Well, OK…" Fox sighed. "I'll let you have this one, but I'm definitely winning the next match! Er, why have you gone that colour?" he asked noticing for the first time.

Luigi looked up somewhat bleary-eyed.

" _I think I'm gonna be sick…"_ he mumbled. And with that, he dashed from the lounge and just about made it to the nearest bathroom.

"Ohhhhh," Fox said as understanding dawned upon him. "That's why he didn't really fight earlier, huh?"

"Fox," said Jigglypuff wearily. "You're an idiot."

* * *

"Well, he did, _ha,_ forgive me after that," Luigi said.

"Yes," said Jigglypuff, draining her cup. "And then you went and upset Link in that Corneria battle by doing absolutely nothing." Luigi raised his hands.

"Master Hand asked me to do so as a challenge. Once again, I had luck on my side. I know Master Hand did have a good word with Link afterwards for his bad performance."

"I think Master Hand did find it funny in a way though," Jigglypuff continued. "I mean, Link hit you with a Bomb, then you both got blasted by Arwing lasers and then when you should have plummeted off stage, Link had landed on the Arwing and flew off before he could do anything. Incidentally," she demanded, "how come whenever anyone else tries that stunt, it never works for them?!"

"Beats me," Luigi chuckled. "Maybe you're better off asking Master Hand about it."

"You know," Jigglypuff pondered, leaning back in her seat, "we still don't really know what Master Hand is, do we? Will we ever find out?"

"Who knows?" Luigi replied. "Anyway, do you fancy another drink?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Coffee Morning Reminiscence: Part 2**

"Remember that time when Link caused a black hole in the Training Room?" Jigglypuff said conversationally. "I think it was at Hyrule Castle and involved a lot of bombs. Nobody could go in there for _days._ "

"Yup," said Luigi. "I still don't understand how Link managed to split himself four separate Links."

"An early Four Swords Adventure thing, perhaps?"

"Hey, good point. I never thought of that. You could say that it's all Linked together."

"… That was terrible, you know that?"

"Sorry, couldn't resist."

Luigi and Jigglypuff were very much relaxed at Brewster's Café, sipping their drinks and enjoying the cosy atmosphere. Every now and then, there were customers trying to look over in a way that they pretended they weren't really looking over at all. Luigi glanced over once and the watchers huddled together apparently examining their drinks most intently.

"Looks like it's going to be really popular this year," said Luigi, noticing that other customers were reading the Smash Programme and the Smashers List in particular which, since it included a brief description of each Smasher, now ran to over fifty pages and counting.

"Well, Master Hand does keep doing the promotions. He's invested a lot into it. And now we've got even more people coming as Smashers. Amazing, isn't it?"

"Do you reckon Mewtwo's finally convinced Master Hand to take him back?" Luigi asked slyly.

"Oh, I seriously hope not," Jigglypuff grimaced. "He thinks he's the best thing ever and keeps saying he's the world's most powerful Pokémon which simply isn't true at all. If it was, I wouldn't have much chance of beating him. I think he's still annoyed with me over the fact that I can beat him using Rest. I've given up trying to figure out how it does that exactly in this world but there you go."

A moment's consultation with the Smash Programme confirmed that Mewtwo was indeed returning to the tournament much to Jigglypuff's dismay. Master Hand didn't often tell the Smashers quite who was going to be in the tournament until the last minute for Reasons of Interest. Many would be quite happy to see the Psychic Pokémon's return but not Jigglypuff; it made her feel even less relevant.

Trying to distract Jigglypuff from the unwelcome news, Luigi said: "I hear we're upgrading from the Alloys in the Multi-Man mode to these things called Miis, controlled by some Master Mii or something. They have much more variety and they seem to be a little more intelligent."

"Ah, yes," Jigglypuff smirked. "Well, come Cruel Smash, I'll simply float underneath the stage and let them fall to their doom as I have done for the past two tournaments." (As it turned out, the Miis laughed at such tactics much to the surprise of herself and Kirby and as a result, they lasted approximately less than ten seconds.)

"We'll see," said Luigi carefully. "Besides," he sighed. "Master Hand's already issued me a challenge: I've got to survive Cruel Smash for at least a minute."

"Ouch," said Jigglypuff sympathetically. (As it turned out, the easiest way to defeat the hordes of Cruel Miis was to simply throw them off the edge, something Luigi found out on his 16th attempt at the challenge or so. It was hell.)

"Well, I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. In the meantime, do you think we'll have another adventure?"

"What, like we had during the Melee tournament?" Jigglypuff reminisced. "Oh, yes, that was pretty fun!"

"Yeah, real fun…"

* * *

" _Adventure Mode Start! Your objective is to reach the end of each stage, defeat your opponents and eventually defeat the final boss. You have a time limit for this. If you fail any of your objectives, you will receive a Game Over. I'm not letting multiple stocks for this if you both go! Starting Stage 1: Mushroom Kingdom Adventure. Good luck!"_

"Remind me why Master Hand is making us do a simulated adventure again?" Luigi asked once Master Hand's voice faded into nothingness.

"Because it should get good viewing figures," Jigglypuff said. "Because it isn't enough just to have us fighting each other all the time, but the audience apparently needs to know what an adventure feels like. Or something like that. Not that I've actually been on many myself…" Jigglypuff shuffled on the spot. "This is going to require heroics isn't it?"

Luigi carefully scanned his surroundings.

"This is just like home, the Mushroom Kingdom," he said. Indeed, the pair could see scores of never-ending Warp Pipes, fields of Fire Flowers and giant hills with slow, blinking eyes. "But it isn't exactly the same. I suppose we better get going…"

Their objective was simple: they had to reach the end goal. The trouble was, as an electronic time flashing above told them, they had to reach it in 7 minutes.

"7 minutes?!" Jigglypuff cried out in alarm. She wasn't exactly a fast Pokémon. "How are we supposed to do that?"

"Oh, it isn't too bad," said a relieved Luigi. "The goal isn't too far really. I've done things more difficult than this in far less time. I was afraid it was going to be a bit like Tubular."

"Tubular?" Jigglypuff blinked in confusion.

"I'll explain another time."

Despite the urgency of the mission, Luigi could not help but feel he was in his natural element. They encountered numerous Goombas, Koopas, and Paratroopas which were, for the most part, easily dispatched, especially by Luigi jumping on their heads. Sometimes, they were even more quickly defeated by the use of items such as fans that they found in the floating blocks on the way.

"Weird," Jigglypuff muttered. She eyed the otherwise unassuming brick blocks. "Really weird…"

"Is it? I suppose it's just normal for me."

"Yes, but, have you actually ever wondered how these blocks stay up?" Jigglypuff demanded. "And how on earth they contain these items? Don't they just contain coins or Mushrooms or whatever in your world?"

"Usually," said Luigi. "But as for the blocks staying up like that, ehhhhh, I guess it's like a kind of anti-gravity or something."

"You mean you don't know?!"

"Never really concerned me," said Luigi breezily. "Hey, are you alright?"

"I just feel… you know… responsible. You have to _be_ responsible on adventures. You have to be responsible for someone or something, huh? That creates pressure and I'm not too keen on pressure."

"You do all right during matches," Luigi pointed out. "There's a lot of pressure there."

"That's different. I do battles all the time at home so it's no big deal. It's just… this."

Luigi scratched his head. This was a different experience, him having to do the reassuring on an adventure. "Just think of it as a series of Pokémon battles," Luigi said brightly. "The Goombas can be Normal-Types while Koopas are… uh… Ground-Types! Paratroopas are obviously Ground and Flying-Types then."

"Well, OK…" Jigglypuff hesitated.

They eventually came to a platform with a Super Mushroom emblazoned upon it, cueing an assault by 10 Yoshis. These were not like the Yoshi they knew. They were more vicious for one. Jigglypuff was swallowed twice and briefly trapped in an egg. It was not a pleasant experience. She gave them what was coming to them with a good, solid Pound.

"New move?" Jigglypuff asked as Luigi launched himself at several Yoshis at once. There was a mini explosion. Luigi picked himself up and coughed.

"Yeah. I call it the Green Missile. Can backfire sometimes though and I get sent really far. Which can be useful at times I'll admit."

"Yikes!" Jigglypuff was forced to side-dodge a Yoshi attempting to batter her in his egg form. "That egg looks hard!"

"Hard-boiled even."

"Ha, ha, ha…"

Luigi was whacked a few times by the Yoshis' eggs and several Ground Pounds in the general chaos but eventually they were taken out. All that was left between them and the goal were a few Goombas and Koopas. They clambered along the wavy Warp Pipe, careful to keep their balance. Soon enough, they were at the flagpole and Luigi couldn't resist climbing up it and pulling a pose as he jumped back off. Jigglypuff rolled her eyes. The Toad running back and forth just behind them didn't seem to notice anything. Maybe it wasn't actually there at all.

Next up was a fight on top of Princess Peach's Castle.

"Bro? Peach?" Luigi croaked.

"They're not the same people," Jigglypuff reminded him. "They're just, you know, copies."

"Yeah, I know, but…"

Even though he had fought against Mario several times now in official matches, he was still uneasy about doing so as was Mario. They always made sure to have a drink together at least after such matches. And besides…

It just unnerved him to see the two people he knew best just look at him like that. Like… he wasn't worth bothering with at all. He was useless. A waste of space. He still lacked Mario's confidence and he didn't think he would ever get it.

"OUCH!" Jigglypuff cried suddenly. Peach had stabbed her from underneath with her trusty parasol. "That seriously hurt! What gives?"

Luigi was left to fight Mario. They countered each other's Spin Jumps and burnt each with their respective green and red fireballs. Luigi swept Mario's legs from underneath him. Mario retaliated with a swift Super Jump Punch battering the green-hatted plumber to one side. Luigi gritted his teeth and shot another scorching fireball. It irritated him that he and his brother had very similar abilities apart from Luigi using his Green Missile and Mario brushing opponents aside with his Super Cape, a leftover from a past adventure. Either he had to try and change something or Mario would.

Luigi grabbed a dormant Bob-omb and flung it at his brother. However, with lightning reflexes, Mario reflected the volatile item with a flick of his cape. Luigi didn't even have time to shield before the Bob-omb exploded in his face. He was launched far backwards and would have plummeted out of sight from the castle walls had not Jigglypuff rushed over to grab him.

* * *

"Whoa, hold on, that isn't right," Luigi frowned.

"Of course it is," said Jigglypuff. "I saw what was happening. I'm sure of it."

"You were on the other side fighting Peach," Luigi said. "There's no way you'd have been able to get over to my side in time to stop me from falling. You'd have had to rush past Mario and I doubt he would have just conveniently stepped aside for you."

"Really? Is that what happened?"

Luigi nodded. "Yup. I just managed to grab onto the edge of the roof. And besides, you were yelling "WATCH OUT FOR THE GIANT ROCKET!""

"Ohhh…"

* * *

"WATCH OUT FOR THE GIANT ROCKET!"

Luigi pulled himself back up before Mario had the chance to stamp on his fingers or whatever. _What's she talking about?_ And then he noticed it. A Giant Banzai Bill. And it was heading for his side.

"That thing's gonna explode!" Luigi shouted. "Try to throw Peach over this way!"

"What?!"

"Just do it!"

Jigglypuff, nursing a bruise from an earlier turnip assault, got within Peach's range and burst out a quick lullaby sending Peach immediately to sleep (though she wished that people didn't go to sleep every time she sang). She grabbed the princess by her dress and threw her down from the tower. Luigi stopped Mario from trying to escape with a tremendous punch. He then jumped on the tower just before the Banzai Bill struck and exploded.

"WAAAAAAHHHH!" Mario and Peach practically flew off the stage and crashed signalling their defeat.

"Living rockets." Jigglypuff shook her head, which is to say, her whole body. "What will they think of next?" Luigi wiped his forehead. That had been close.

"Come on," he sighed. "Let's move on to the next section."

* * *

The section involving Donkey Kong was actually pretty easy. They had to fight two tiny Donkey Kongs in Kongo Jungle and while their small size made it difficult to get some hits in, it also meant that when they were hit, they were easier to launch. Luigi meteor-smashed one of them and when Jigglypuff booted the other one, which was airborne in trying to get from the rock to the raft, near the ledge, it air-dodged for some reason and consequently fell to its doom. The next battle against a giant Donkey Kong in Jungle Japes was, funnily enough, even easier. He had tried jumping over to them, missed and caught the ledge only to them be hit by a Klaptrap and instantly drown. All in all, it was a breather really.

It was the Underground Maze that proved more challenging.

"Get a move on, Luigi!" she yelled. "We've only got 7 minutes." The Pokémon looked at him and saw that he had gone white.

"R-ReDeads," he stammered. "Octoroks. L-Like-Likes."

Jigglypuff saw what Luigi was looking at and stared. The ReDeads were particularly gruesome; they appeared emaciated, with brown, shrivelled skin on the point of rotting. They made eerie moaning noises that made one's hairs freeze on the back of the neck and probably everywhere else. Their soulless eyes, no, _eye sockets_ were like the doorways to hell.

Mind you, Jigglypuff had seen some very creepy Ghost-Type Pokémon who loved nothing better than scare the living daylights out of their pathetic victims so she pulled herself together and told herself to stop being wimpy about it. Though she could see why they were distressing for Luigi considering that they were humanoid-shaped. And they were lumbering closer.

"M-makes me think of the g-ghosts," Luigi mumbled.

Jigglypuff broke a handy crate and slashed one with the Beam Sword.

"Wh-what are d-doing?!" Luigi shrieked. The moaning was becoming incredibly high-pitched. He winced at the sound.

"Well, we can't just stand here and let them attack us!" she snapped. "Don't be such a fraidy-Meowth!"

Luigi gulped but Jigglypuff was right. They couldn't afford to waste time, not when this was more complicated than the Mushroom Kingdom Adventure. They had to randomly find the Triforce out of 6 rooms; if they came across a room with the Master Sword, they were forced to fight Link.

They dashed through the maze as fast as possible, held up by Octoroks firing rocks at them and the need to jump platforms. They came across a Master Sword which meant they had to trounce Link in double-quick time.

"Shield-eaters and world leaders have many likes alike," Jigglypuff mused to herself once they resumed exploring.

"What?"

"It's a Hylian proverb apparently," Jigglypuff explained. "Link mentioned it at some point. BEHIND YOU, LUIGI!"

"GAAAAAHHH!"

A Like-Like had crept up behind Luigi and swallowed him whole. Jigglypuff grimaced at the kicking and screaming from the inside the monster's belly and wondered if it would get severe stomach pains. Infuriated by this torment, the Like-Like spat Luigi back up and shuffled away before it could be attacked again. Luigi groaned. He was covered with a foul-smelling slime.

"If this had happened before Kongo Jungle," Jigglypuff said, stepping back a little, "you could have at least washed that off then."

"How on earth does Link put up with this stuff?" Luigi groaned. "Yuck… I stink…"

"StInKy! StInKy! PeE-eWwWwW!" said a random Mr Saturn who happened to appear from one of the crates lying about.

They entered the next area only to find it was another Master Sword forcing a battle from the pair. Luigi was struck several times by Link's arrows in a heroic bid to stop Jigglypuff being hit by them. As soon as there was an opening, Jigglypuff was able to use Rest causing Link to blast upwards leaving a trail of destruction behind him.

"You know, that just heals me in my world," said Jigglypuff. "I wonder why it blasts people off here…"

Luigi didn't reply, distracted as he was by the sudden sight of a number of lurching ReDeads. And then one somehow dropped from the ceiling.

"GET IT OFF ME! GET IT OFF ME!" Luigi shrieked. The monster attempted to bite his neck and strangle him at the same time. It smelt even more foul than the Like-Like slime. Jigglypuff grimaced as Luigi wildly fought it off before incinerating it completely. He stood there gibbering on the spot.

" _Those eye sockets…"_ he moaned. _"The way they looked at me…"_

"These are part of the simulation, aren't they?" Jigglypuff hesitated.

"Simulation or not, let's get out of here!"

Of course, it was never that simple. They ended up having to fight each and every last Link, not to mention nearly getting reduced to ashes by lava, before finally finding the Triforce.

In the background, Master Hand chuckled. Well, he couldn't make it too easy for them now, could he?

* * *

Once they had defeated Zelda at the Temple, they swiftly moved onto Brinstar where they battled Samus, taking care to avoid the acid that occasionally pooled up from below. As soon as that was over with however, a warning klaxon blared out. They had 40 seconds to reach the top of the Brinstar Escape Shaft or the acid would dissolve them and it would be Game Over.

"40 SECONDS?!" Jigglypuff shouted. "But I'm not fast at all! And I don't want to be dissolved even if it isn't real! It… it isn't real is it?"

"Getting out of tight situations like this is part of real life though," said Luigi. He bounded up the platforms as fast as possible thanking the stars that he had such an excellent jumping ability, even better, he thought with a satisfied smirk, than Mario's.

Jigglypuff thought quickly. She looked up the shaft, which was very tall, and saw that it had at least a ceiling. She then smiled. This wouldn't be too bad after all. She activated her shield and kept it on until it shattered. She was consequently catapulted straight to the top of the shaft cutting out all that unnecessary flinging about of one's self.

"Hey, a use for the Shield Break at last," Jigglypuff said to herself triumphantly.

Some seconds later, Luigi hurled himself onto the last platform which would take them to their next destination.

"Wha-?" he breathed. "How did you get up here before me? No, wait, don't tell me, the shield, right?"

"Yup."

"Figures."

The plumber and the Pokémon soon found themselves at Green Greens where they battled a single Kirby, several Kirbies with different character abilities and, since they defeated the Kirbies very quickly, a Giant Kirby which loomed over them and said, "Hi!"

"Giant Kirby KO Bonus. Nice," Luigi said approvingly once they battered the giant puffball out of the ring. It was a bonus unique to this section. Just like, Luigi thought with pride, he had a couple of unique bonuses. Master Hand had arranged all that, of course. Presumably he had been impressed with his abilities and it took a lot to impress Master Hand.

Next they fought Fox on Corneria where the Smasher kept running away from them for the mere purpose of being aggravating considering the time limit. The next was Falco who was certainly more aggressive and would have knocked Jigglypuff out with a Star KO had not Luigi managed to blast Falco immediately off stage with a Super Jump Punch before Jigglypuff had disappeared into the distance.

"That was close," she muttered once she reached solid ground again. "I hate it when that happens. Ah, finally, something I recognise." She greeted her Pokémon opponents warmly and didn't have any issues in beating up other Jigglypuff. It was alright since they had to be a lower level than her.

"You don't find that weird?" Luigi asked once he finished wrestling with a Pikachu and chucking it off stage with the same method often used against Bowser. "I mean, fighting someone that looks just like yourself?"

"Well, I'm a Pokémon, it's natural for me," Jigglypuff explained. "We fight each other to get stronger. Besides, don't you fight other humans at home to get stronger?"

"Not really," Luigi shrugged. He picked up a Poke Ball and threw it only to get a Goldeen. "You know there aren't many humans where I come from at all. And besides, I mean when you're fighting someone that looks a lot like yourself."

"I never really think of it. And come to think of it, don't you have a human ruler?"

"Yeah, never really understood the politics of that. At least it isn't an issue."

"Hmm…"

* * *

"Whose bright idea was it to make us do this?!"

"Crazy Hand's, perhaps?"

Luigi and Jigglypuff had moved onto the F-Zero Grand Prix where they ran the risk of being run over by utterly crazy, junked-up, futuristic racers. They could perhaps survive one running over, but twice ran the great risk of shooting off the stage. Three times and they'd be screwed.

"Hey, wait up!" Luigi cried when Jigglypuff used Rollout to zoom along the track which was far faster than her trying to run. He dashed after her and picked up a couple of trophies on the way. Every now and then, they had to jump to avoid the F-Zero vehicles. "Mamma mia, this is crazy!"

Fortunately, they managed to make it to the finish line without being mown down and it was then the simple matter of defeating Captain Falcon and showing him their moves, so to speak. He didn't even get the chance to pull off a smooth Falcon Punch.

"So what next?" Jigglypuff asked. Her question was soon answered.

"KaY-o! Me Mr SaTuRn! DiNg! YoU cOmE fIgHtInG?"

"Hi! Hi! EnJoY tOdAy'S bAtTlE, zOoM!"

Now they were in Onett, fighting three Nesses. The only items available were the Mr Saturns. There were lots of Mr Saturns.

"I, mR sAtUrN, cAn Do AlL fOR yOU."

"ArE yOu SmAsHiNg To Me?"

"SmAsH! sMaSh!

"We FeEl GrOoVe!"

"Ugh," Jigglypuff groaned. "Let's just get rid of these weirdos shall we?"

"HmMmMmMmM, wE aRe MaNy! MaNy, MaNy, MaNy, ZoOm!"

"DoInG! sCaRy OpPoNeNtS mAkE bIG fIrE aND pOuNd Of HuRt!"

"So! YoU hAVe MaNy SkILlS, dInG?"

"PeE-eWwWwWwW! sTiNkY! sTiNkY! tHiS mAtCh StInKs!"

"SHUT UP!" Jigglypuff screamed.

* * *

"Damn, Mr Saturns…" Jigglypuff muttered.

Luigi shrugged and sipped at his Deluxe Special Coffee, brought over to him by a Mr Saturn earlier. "They're funny creatures though. Quite cute really."

* * *

After the distractions that were the Mr Saturns were taken care of, Luigi and Jigglypuff had to climb Icicle Mountain and fight two pairs of Ice Climbers. Luigi insisted that they didn't punch out the Polar Bears and Topis though unless they attacked first. Jigglypuff shrugged but it meant less work on their part. After that, there was a battle against the Wire Frames which thankfully didn't take too long.

Next in line, then, was a battle against Metal Mario and Metal Luigi.

"Steel-Types are so hard to deal with," Jigglypuff moaned as she desperately tried to whack one off the stage.

Luigi winced. "Must you attack my metal counterpart with quite so much ferocity?"

"How else am I supposed to get rid of them?"

"Well…"

Luigi dashed forwards and span into Metal Mario. Metal Mario swung a steel fist and connected with Luigi's jaw. Luigi yelled and clutched his now throbbing, deadened chin. Metal Mario punched again though Luigi rolled out of the way and performed a Super Jump Punch. Metal Mario was sent only a short distance.

"Get over here, damn you," Luigi muttered, rubbing his jaw.

At the edge of the Battlefield, Luigi tripped up the metallic Smasher and grabbed hold of his tempered overalls. He swung him in a circle before deftly throwing Metal Mario to the left where his weight caused him to fall down very quickly. Metal Mario tried to recover and managed to grab the edge. However, Luigi was already waiting for him and kicked him with a certain kick that resulted in a meteor smash and a satisfying striking sound. He grinned. No-one else seemed to have that technique.

"Little help over here!"

Poor Jigglypuff was being battered by Metal Luigi and any time soon, she would be blasted off the stage as she was quite easy to launch. Luigi slammed into his metal counterpart with a hefty Luigi missile and span into him. Metal people were so hard to budge…

"Aha!" Jigglypuff cried out, spotting something on the other side of the stage. She floated over leaving Luigi to sidestep his opponent's violent attacks though occasionally catching a punch in the stomach or so.

"Eat Bob-omb, buster!" Jigglypuff yelled dramatically. Luigi's eyes widened and he got out of the way in time.

You couldn't tell if a metal character's eyes widened but presumably they did as would be expected when an object of explosive destruction flies straight towards you. The Bob-omb exploded and Metal Luigi was flung violently off the stage. He attempted to recover; however, Luigi leapt off the stage and knocked down the metal Smasher into the abyss with a furious punch.

"Hooray!" said Jigglypuff brightly. "Now we've only got Final Destination!"

"I think my hand's gone dead," Luigi moaned as he returned to the stage. He flexed his fingers experimentally. "Any harder and I would have broken it."

"Oh, it'll be fine. Anyway, let's move on!"

The scenery dissolved momentarily and with a dizzying rush of colours and light that quickly dissolved into darkness, Luigi and Jigglypuff found themselves at Final Destination, that endpoint of all battles. The sky, if it could be so-called, was pitch-black, highlighted only by a series of criss-crossing, luminous green lines. The platform underneath their feet was simple in its construction: a giant octagon covered by a rough surface that made it easy for fighters to grip upon. And then they beheld their opponent.

"Bowser…" Luigi breathed. "Giant Bowser."

The plumber had fought the monstrous Koopa in the real world on a number of occasions and while he may not have been utterly terrified to the point of near-fainting, freezing on the spot or feeling violently sick anymore, he still felt reasonably frightened by his presence, especially Giant Bowser and with good reason. He looked as if he could easily crush them with one hand and in breathing fire, they would be utterly engulfed by its flames. It wouldn't kill them of course, but that was no reason to become complacent.

Giant Bowser took a deep breath.

"Oh, mamma mia."

Luigi and Jigglypuff shielded from the continuous flamethrower, hoping that the fire would burn itself out before their shields broke, especially Jigglypuff since one shield break would finish her instantly.

As soon as Giant Bowser's flamethrower petered out, Luigi and Jigglypuff immediately moved and landed several blows; its giant frame making it an easy target. Jigglypuff pounded Giant Bowser's shell, neatly avoiding its spikes while Luigi charged up his special attack. Giant Bowser swiped the air with his claws however and Luigi caught the brunt of the attack, tearing into his overalls.

Jigglypuff battered the larger-than-life Koopa with a nifty Rollout. Giant Bowser returned the favour by swinging his heavy tail. Jigglypuff squealed and crashed onto the floor.

Luigi kicked his opponent and delivered several small blows before Giant Bowser grabbed Luigi and flung him bodily into the air where he had to use his Green Missile to get back onto solid ground.

"Luigi! Are you OK?"

Luigi gritted his teeth and performed a Super Jump Punch, having very little chance of missing. They heard the pleasing sound of a critical hit and Giant Bowser roared as he was lifted off the ground. Before Giant Bowser could retaliate, Jigglypuff sang it to sleep. It fell down on the spot and began snoring loudly.

With a single nod to each other, Luigi and Jigglypuff positioned themselves and unleashed their one-hit wonder moves. The combined power grievously assaulted Giant Bowser and, with a final punch from Jigglypuff, he was nothing but a twinkle in the sky.

"Phew… is that it now?" Luigi asked. "These were perfectly good overalls and then he had to rip them."

" **GUESS AGAIN, WIMPS."**

* * *

A demonic-figure crashed into the centre of Final Destination. Its giant horns gleamed. Its shell was more spike-studded and lethal than normal. Its breath was tinged with the colour of darkness. When it attacked, its body crackled with violent electricity. Giga Bowser.

" **GWAHAHAHAHA! YOU THINK YOU CAN TAKE ME ON? YOU WOULDN'T EVEN BE ABLE TO DREAM OF IT! YOU ARE NOTHING SPECIAL! YOU ARE WEAK! YOU ARE USELESS! YOU ARE PATHETIC! YOU ARE NOTHING AT ALL!"**

Luigi and Jigglypuff winced at its ferocious, bellowing voice and struggled to keep their footing as each heavy stomp made the platform quake.

" **YOU SHOULDN'T EVEN BE HERE. YOU'RE WORTHLESS. IT'S OBVIOUS MASTER HAND LET YOU IN AS A JOKE. YOU WOULDN'T BE MISSED IF YOU WENT. GWAH! I MIGHT AS WELL JUST CRUSH YOU STRAIGHT AWAY."**

Worst of all was the feeling that Giga Bowser may have had a point, his voice having a peculiar persuasive quality. Jigglypuff was just one of many Jigglypuff from her homeworld and by fluke of flukes, happened to be picked for the Smash Bros tournament in the first place because of her dulcet singing abilities. Other than that, what was there to mark her out? Was she even relevant? She highly doubted it. She could easily be replaced and no one would give a damn.

And Luigi. He was just the younger twin brother of a world-famous hero, a world-famous hero everyone looked up to. Even Bowser took pleasure in having a mortal enemy as worthy as Mario. Everyone knew and respected Mario. But Luigi? He was the weak one, the forgettable one, and above all, the cowardly one. Why would anyone bother with him? How could he be a hero with such qualities like that? Even Mario had gone on more adventures on his own lately, leaving his brother behind. After all, it wasn't as if he could be much use.

Luigi's green fire burned brightly, a small beacon in the darkness.

" **RWAAARGH!"** Giga Bowser roared. Searing heat struck his spiky shell. **"HOW DARE YOU?"**

Luigi decided it wasn't true at all. Whatever Giga Bowser's malicious thoughts were whispering to them, they weren't true at all. He had people to fight for, had fought for, and would continue to fight for.

Jigglypuff slammed into Giga Bowser and proceeded to slap him continuously. She wondered whether her journey would end at some point but while it continued, she decided that she would enjoy as much of it as possible.

"Oh, we dare," Luigi said with as much grin as he could muster. "Don't underestimate us because that's the last mistake you'll ever make."

"That's right!" Jigglypuff declared. "Prepare for pain, Giant whatever you are!"

Jigglypuff sidestepped an electrifying punch and pounded him again. Taking advantage of the distraction, Luigi zipped under Giga Bowser and unleashed a powerful Super Jump Punch. There was practically an explosion as Giga Bowser launched upwards bellowing angrily.

Luigi took an almighty clawing to the chest and fell down, winded. Jigglypuff attempted to attack Giga Bowser from behind only for Giga Bowser to heavily swing his tail, it struck home with a solid thump and Jigglypuff was launched violently off the stage. She ended up mere inches away from the blast line. She puffed herself up and began floating back.

Luigi spun into Giga Bowser, knocking the monstrous Koopa off-balance, and kicked him for good measure. He shielded against another blast of fire but took a great deal of damage when rammed by Giga Bowser's overly-large horns. Gasping, Luigi hit his giant foe several times and used an especially good Green Missile. By this time, Jigglypuff had got back onto the stage. She took one look at the incredible turtle and decided that singing probably wouldn't do all that much at all. She rolled into Giga Bowser only to be knocked off-stage again, thankfully with only a glancing blow.

"Let's finish this!" Luigi called out.

Using the good old traditional method of Bowser-disposing, Luigi grabbed Giga Bowser by the tail and began to spin him round, with a mega strength that no-one would ever suspect Luigi of having. It was slow-going at first what with Giga Bowser's claws scrabbling in the floor but he gradually picked up speed and threw Giga Bowser just as Jigglypuff had repositioned herself on the stage. She used Rest.

" **GWAHHHHHHHHH!"**

With a final launch, Giga Bowser blasted upwards and disappeared over the blast line and into the skyline, vanishing with a final twinkle. Luigi and Jigglypuff stood still, catching their breath.

"Are we… done now?" Jigglypuff gasped.

"I-I think so…"

" _Excellent work, you two,"_ the disembodied voice of Master Hand spoke from seemingly nowhere. _"You show good cooperation and have utilised a number of techniques. There were some shaky moments but overall, I think you handled the situation quite well."_

"Uhh… Master Hand?" Luigi asked. Final Destination dissolved before their eyes. They were on their way back to the Smash Mansion. "All of that… is it was a simulation… wasn't it?"

Master Hand chuckled.

" _Of course it was a simulation. But what makes you think that it wasn't real?"_

* * *

"We've come a long way since then, huh?" Jigglypuff smiled.

"Yeah, but we did pretty well then considering that neither of us lost our stocks. I know Ganondorf had a horrendous time trying to do the same thing. Maybe it was put on intense or something."

"He's slow and has a pathetic jump," Jigglypuff said as a matter of fact. "That would not help at all."

"Yeah. Hey, have you ever tried Mr Saturn coffee?" Luigi asked as he warmed his hands around his mug.

"Can't say I have," Jigglypuff said with some hesitation. "I hope not, anyway. It probably does weird things to you."

"Oh, yeah? Well, I reckon it's probably made with the water from Mount Pajamaja."

"Why's that?"

"Because that does weird things to you," Luigi shuddered. "Like really weird dreams. I couldn't look at a Mega Mushroom for quite some time afterwards, let's put it that way."

"YoU wAnT cOFfEe, KaY-o?" a Mr Saturn waiter asked them cheerily.

Luigi and Jigglypuff looked at each other.

"No thanks," said Luigi. "I've already got coffee."

"YoU aLrEaDy HaVe Mr SaTuRn CoFfEe, DiNg!" it beamed. "YoU oRdErEd It BeFoRe!"

Luigi looked at his empty cup. Everything was already beginning to take on a swirl of psychedelic colours.

"Oh, mamma mia…" Luigi mumbled before slamming his head against the table.


	3. Chapter 3

**Uhh, I should have updated this one much earlier! But then I got distracted my heavy studies and part of the final chapter of this went missing. *sigh* I really need to keep on top of this! Anyway, this part covers the Brawl tournament. I love the Subspace Emissary mode, shame we don't have something like that in the fourth one.**

* * *

 **Coffee Morning Reminiscence: Part 3**

"Well, at least he's quietened down now," said Brewster. "The noise was making some of the customers a little nervous."

"At least until they found out who was making the noise exactly," Jigglypuff sighed, "and then some of them wanted to take pictures. I mean, that's just typical."

"Well, he is a Smasher," Brewster pointed out.

"Obviously, but who tries to take pictures of people when they're high on Mr Saturn coffee doing Arceus knows what and they probably don't even remember afterwards what they did? I wouldn't want to be reminded of that," she sniffed. "It's tasteless."

"They must find it amusing somehow. And wouldn't you do the same if it was someone like Ike or Mewtwo perhaps?"

"Ye- no."

Brewster hid a smile.

"Anyway," Jigglypuff continued. "Why do you even sell that stuff when you know what it does?"

"Some customers think that drinking this coffee will let their imaginations run free, spur their creativity and allow them to seek the higher levels of truth. Many customers just find its psychedelic raves appealing and want to see what kind of weird dreams they have. They also tend to have smaller cups I may add."

"Yes, well, I don't think Luigi intended to have a large mug of the stuff. Or to have it at all for that matter."

"Ah, well, these things happen. No doubt one of my Saturns thought that Luigi needed such a coffee for services rendered or something. Or they quite simply got the order wrong. And while we're here, what was he yelling about time holes for?"

"Past adventure."

"And the rubber ducks?"

"... I've no idea."

"And that business about Prince Peasley and the Bedsmith was frankly-"

"I think we better stop there," Jigglypuff said hurriedly. Her cheeks were a brighter pink than normal. "I'm not even sure if it was the coffee talking or what. Not that it should matter. I mean… it's not as if I… See, this is why I will not have Mr Saturn coffee. There are things I would rather keep private after all. I would much rather have a refreshing cup of tea. It's still as splendid as ever, by the way."

"Oh, good. I'm glad to hear that."

Luigi groaned from the couch.

"Well," said Brewster, "if you don't mind, I'll let you deal with this. I need to get back to the shop front before everything descends into chaos."

"No problem."

Brewster silently closed the door behind him, leaving the Smashers alone in the special Quiet Room, a place reserved for those who had partaken of the Mr Saturn coffee, especially if they had a particularly bad reaction to it, had too much of it, or, as in Luigi's case, both.

"Uhhhh… is everything still attached to me?"

"Looks like it."

"Ugh… my head feels fuzzier than a Fuzzie and I think I can still see flashes of coloured lights," Luigi moaned. He put a hand over his eyes. "OK, what happened? What was I saying?"

"Well, at one point, I think you said you were being chased by a molten Chain Chomp or something. Then there was something about never getting any cake. Then there were some other bits. Then there was something I'm not sure I'd like to repeat and you probably don't want to hear anyway."

"Oh, stars above. Was there anything else?"

"You mentioned the incident that took place in the Brawl tournament," Jigglypuff said quietly.

There was a moment's grim silence.

"Ah," said Luigi. He tried sitting up although this required a coordination of muscles that he wouldn't be able to use until the coffee finally wore off completely. "Well… I suppose it was on the back of my mind what with talking about the other two tournaments and everything."

"I guess it was hard for everyone involved at the time, huh?"

"Yeah…"

* * *

Where was he? Where was everyone else? _What was going on?_

Luigi shivered despite the warm air. He didn't want to be alone. Not after what had happened a mere month before. He was still haunted by nightmares from that day. Facing down the end of the universe, that laughing, maniacal jester, and then… blankness… oblivion. Until…

Luigi clutched his head. Stop it! Stop thinking about it! Concentrate on the situation at hand.

He appeared to be on a dusty road somewhere. Right. There were trees and rocks about. Right. He could be anywhere. OK. He didn't see any Goombas or such wandering about or Kleptos flying overhead or any Bandits lurking in the shadows. OK. He must have left the Mushroom Kingdom. Sure. He was pretty sure he was in the Smash World. There weren't any hills with eyes and the clouds looked different and so forth. Great. So… what was he doing wandering out here? How come he wasn't at the Smash Mansion?

Had the teleportation portals not worked properly? Or had Master Hand sent them out on a quest or something for some kind of experience? Why couldn't he remember…?

Some of the others must have got here first. Mario, Peach and Yoshi had definitely entered before him; Luigi had been running behind a little owing to some prior engagements. So they had to be in the Smash World. Maybe the portal was just a little haywire. Yeah. He was quite sure that all this would be sorted out momentarily. Someone would locate him; Master Hand probably had tabs on all his Smashers; someone would pick him up.

Something popped out of the grass.

Luigi, still shaken up, yelped and put up a defensive stance. The creature, a strange, waddling head-like creature, blinked and waddled on its way. Luigi breathed a sigh of relief and felt ashamed of himself for doing so. It looked pretty harmless, really harmless in fact, even more so than the average Goomba which could give you a nasty bite. But hey, it could just look harmless; making a person let his guard down before being viciously assaulted.

Normally, Luigi wasn't quite so paranoid about such things since he was very much capable of defending himself. But he couldn't defend himself against _him_ , he couldn't stop himself doing those things, he had nearly killed-

Another waddling creature stepped before him. Luigi sought to defend himself again. This was ridiculous. Where were they? Had something really gone wrong?

Something struck him heavily in the back. Luigi only just had time to scream as he soared into the air. Soon enough, everything went black.

* * *

"Come on, stupid thing, work!"

Jigglypuff smacked the controls in front of her but got nothing for her trouble as expected.

"Master Hand's gonna kill me if I'm late," she moaned. "How did Pikachu, Lucario and that Pokémon Trainer get through fine but now I suddenly can't?"

Maybe Master Hand would be quite understanding. After all, it wasn't her fault that the transportation portal had gone ka-put. Maybe a couple of others had the same issue. They'd soon find out what was wrong when it became clear she wasn't coming out to the other side and fix the thing letting her through. She had only been a few minutes behind the others, she just had some things to sort out such as harvesting the berries and cancelling the milk which she had forgot about until the last minute. It would all be fine, right? It would probably only take a few minutes.

She waited.

* * *

Trophified. That was the state Smashers ended up in when a special attack bypassed their natural defences granted in this world by Master Hand, catching them by surprise, or when they were grievously injured. Neither happened very much at all, other when they failed the special adventure challenges that Master hand and Crazy Hand occasionally organised. It was a state in which the Smasher could not move, could not talk and had very little, if any awareness, of what was going on in the outside world.

In the beginning, the form happened to be that of dolls rather than trophies. Master Hand was quite interested in dolls, er, plushies back then. By the Melee Tournament however, this had changed to trophies with Master Hand citing this as 'a more worthy pursuit that speaks of sophistication and elegance.' Also, even Crazy Hand had laughed at him which was rather rich considering his collection of batteries and drinking cartons. Everyone agreed that trophies added a level of maturity to the tournament and that settled that.

The method in which one was revived from a trophy state was quite simply to touch the base. Or, as it turned out, revival by a timed badge, when no-one was around to touch the base.

Seeing light, Luigi opened his eyes somewhat groggily. Several questions fought each other in their efforts to be the first one thought. 1: What was he doing here? 2: Where was he? 3: How long had he been out? 4: Who knocked him out in the first place? 5: Why did he have a badge stuck to his nose? 6: Which idiot put a badge on his nose in the first place? 7: Why was he getting a sense of déjà vu? He'd been knocked out, ended up somewhere strange; something horrible was going to happen to him, like in the castle…

"Hey, uh, Luigi, are you OK? I know I've just revived you but you look really out of sorts…"

It took Luigi a moment to realise that the person talking to him was Ness, the psychic kid of Onett. Luigi flinched as Ness pulled the badge off his nose.

"Uh, thanks…" Luigi mumbled. He rubbed the small of his back. Stars above, whatever had hit him really _hurt._

"I'm glad you're here," said Ness even though he was wishing for someone who looked like they weren't going to faint again at any moment. "Something has really gone wrong in the Smash World. I don't know where the others are at the moment and I got separated from Lucas-"

"Lucas?"

"He's another PSI user like me. And then this really large man with a spiky moustache and yellow hat tired to trophify Lucas but I pushed him out of the way and got hit instead."

"Ah, you mean Wario," said Luigi grimly. "Whatever it is he's up to, it'll involve money or treasure of some kind."

"Oh, right. But anyway, I don't know about you but I can't really sense anyone at the moment."

"Hey, I'm no Psychic. The only person I have a connection with is Mario and I can't even sense him right now."

Ness gasped.

"Then that means they must have got him too! The trophy hunters! We need to revive everyone and team up to take the force down behind this. And I think," he said thoughtfully, looking down at a trophy depicting what seemed to be an unusually fat penguin, "this person here foresaw some of these events and created these badges for our time of need."

"I bet he's the one who struck me with that hammer," Luigi grumbled. "Did he have to do it so hard?"

"We better revive him anyway," said Ness solemnly.

Luigi sighed but touched the trophy base anyway. There was a flash of golden light and before stood his glorious magnificence the fat penguin ruler of Dreamland.

"What? What?" The penguin looked about wildly. "What in tarnation happened?!" He then noticed the figures before him and his face suddenly broke into a wide beam. He pulled both of them together in a crushing hug.

"Yes!" he cried. "I knew you boys would pull through an' obviously help me out 'cos you're meant to be heroes, right? An' those badges worked like a charm too! King Dedede, you're a genius! Hmm, I see my Zelda statue's gone missing but at least I have some backup. An' now my comrades, we must save all the other folks, clobbah some monsters an' beat that Tabuu!"

Luigi and Ness were slightly stunned for a moment on account of Dedede's loud voice and general overbearingness. Ness pulled himself together first.

"So Tabuu is the being behind all this then?"

"Yeeeyup," Dedede confirmed. "Seems like he wants to take over this world an' make it into subspace or somethin'. And to do that, he's also makin' sure that dem Smashers are outta of the way as well! An' I'm a Smasher too I'll have ya know! But I figured his plans, I jus' had to work behind the scenes fer a while. But enough talkin'! We got some clobberin' to do!"

* * *

Jigglypuff had had enough. She had been waiting an unacceptable amount of time. It wasn't as if she was unauthorised to go through the portal as she was calibrated to the system and besides, she had a pass.

 _Master Hand should have all this sorted. Unless there's a lot of trouble going on. Maybe it's Crazy Hand, maybe he's gone completely crazy. I hope the others did get through OK. What if the transportation thing went wrong and they're stuck in some teleport swirly thingy?_

She gave a yawn. By the time she got there, she would just be ready to sleep. It wasn't as if she was planning to do any training straightaway; no-one went into the Training Room on the first day since that was time for settling in, except for Mewtwo who was a weirdo obsessed with being the most powerful anyway and since she didn't see the Pokémon earlier, she could only assume that he wasn't coming back. Hooray!

Finally, the lights on the console switched back on. Jigglypuff tentatively placed a hand into the ether, the substance that would allow her to travel almost instantly to the Smash Mansion. It seemed fine. She stepped into the console.

As soon as she entered however, she was catapulted between several different streams. With a high-pitched scream, she bounced off the metaphorical wall of the ether and, finding the blinding speed and blurred view rather too much, consequently threw up.

She eventually landed with a painful slam into the earth. Where she was though, was not the Smash Mansion.

* * *

 _Subspace,_ Luigi thought, as they stepped into a chaotic atmosphere, a world of darkness in which there were swirling, psychedelic colours and strobe lightning, a world in which primeval monsters stalked the glass-like platforms that dotted the landscape. _Just like the subspace I've been in. Just like Castle Bleck. Just like when the entire universe was going to end by the powers of the Chaos Heart. And I was a perfect match for it. And he controlled me once again to make sure that match happened. I was so weak I couldn't do anything. I nearly died again but even worse that I was nearly a murderer…_

Luigi just felt so tired as he ran through the subspace environment; it was volunteered (not by himself) that he should lead the way what with being the more experienced fighter and all that. He felt that he hadn't a proper sleep in weeks. More often than not, he was plagued with nightmares of the dark events that had occurred not so long ago. If that hadn't happened… well, he would no doubt still be scared here but at least he would feel more prepared for it and perhaps more fuelled by determination.

Using his spin jump, he knocked several Primids out of the way before moving onto the Bombeds while Ness concentrated his PK Fire on some Roaders and Dedede pulverised seven kinds of hell out of a Gamyga.

"HA! There ain't nobody who's a match fer King Dedede! 'Cept fer that Kirby I suppose."

"Oh, you're from Dreamland as well?" Ness politely asked.

"I'm its king!" Dedede declared. "There have been some disagreements here an' there but I'm definitely the king! Kirby keeps me blamin' fer bad things that happen there but I help out when I can, really!"

Ness was quite sure there was more to this than what the apparent monarch was saying but he let it slide and focussed his attention on getting through the monster-ridden area, especially as he wasn't exactly the best jumper in the roster. Only a few them actually used jumps as part of their daily repertoire in their own worlds such as the Mario Bros. for example.

He looked at Luigi now who was being very quiet, even quieter than normal. He tackled each enemy as if it was causing him an enormous amount of pain to do so. He looked pale and thin in the face, gaunt even. Occasionally, he put his hand across his forehead and grimaced. Something bad must have happened on his home world but what?

"Well now, this happens to be a very fine trophy," Dedede chuckled, picking another one up to be revived when they reached a safe area. "Shame I can't keep them fer myself. Ah! Electro-thingy! Go get them my Waddle Dees!"

"Hey, Luigi. Are you OK?" Ness asked, taking advantage of the distraction. "You don't seem yourself."

"No wonder really," said Luigi dully. "I've had a lot happen recently."

"Like what?"

"Well…"

It was still too soon. Much too soon. How could he even mention something like that to Ness? He didn't know how he would get through this. He hadn't even felt able to talk to Mario about it. It was still raw.

It was almost a welcome distraction when they found the Bowser trophy and that an enraged Bowser, refusing to listen to their words, decided to pick a fight with Dedede, only to be soundly beaten and slapped for good measure. Luigi was quite glad he didn't have to get involved.

"Ya eejit!" Dedede shouted. "That there Tabuu is the one behind all this an' we gotta go stop him. So ya comin' with us whether you like it or not!"

"Urrgh… I suppose I haven't any choice," Bowser grumbled. "It's not as if it's the first time I've been roped in to help the world, huh, Green 'Stache?"

"Uh… yeah," said Luigi, somewhat surprised at being addressed.

"And at least I wasn't possessed this time either unlike some."

Luigi clenched his teeth and shook slightly as Bowser stomped past with Dedede cajoling him on the way. Ness looked at the pair, picked up the visual cue, and thanked his lucky stars that he wasn't called upon to save the world every time and suffer the consequences of doing so.

* * *

Jigglypuff tried to figure out where she was. She had to assume that she was in the Smash World because the consequences of thinking otherwise were too horrible to contemplate. She had never seen this area before although she quickly decided that it was not to her taste at all.

"It smells," she muttered to herself, "and it's dirty." She determined that she had landed in a swamp. "AND IT'S RUINED MY BEST HAT!"

Grumbling to herself, Jigglypuff floated out of the swampy environment and tried as best as she could to clean herself off, wishing that she had learned a Water-Type move or something.

"Right," she said to no-one in particular. "If I do not find out what's going in very soon, I am going to get very cross. And you don't want me to get cross."

As if her words had been heard, she was suddenly surrounded by a load of creatures.

"Finally," she said. Then she noticed that they were in fact very unfriendly creatures. Monsters, in fact. These included, and were not limited to: Boom Primids, Hydro Jyx, Poppants, and Freyesh.

"Ah, bugger."

* * *

"OH MY GAWRSH! IT'S KIRBEH!"

Kirby quickly walked over to the unlikely group that was King Dedede, Luigi and Ness. Bowser had stalked off ahead and was currently tormenting Ganondorf's trophy which they found just up ahead. Apparently it was Ganondorf's doing that had caused Bowser to become a trophy in the first place. Kirby, meanwhile, was also carrying a number of trophies that would be revived as soon as it was safe enough to do so.

"Hey guys," he said, not quite as cheery as usual but still with the undertones of cheeriness anyway. "I came across a badge with Dedede's face on it and I thought 'that's weird' but I swallowed it for safekeeping anyway which is just as well because it seemed to revive me when everyone else got trophified and scattered by the blue monster thing. At least you guys are up and walking. Wah!"

"I ain't never been so glad to see you, Kirby!" Dedede cried. "Why, I bet even that Meta Knight is about here somewhere. I'm sure you'll team up with us, right? Right? Of course you will!" he exclaimed before Kirby had a chance to answer. "Now let's go an' beat up the bad guys which definitely isn't me this time!"

And with that, Dedede quite happily dragged off the rather puzzled Kirby who gave Luigi and Ness a look as if to say 'uh, a little help here?'

"That was rather strange," said Ness, "but at least we have a few more trophies now. Anyway, did something happen on your world."

"I was forced to nearly destroy the universe," Luigi said in a monotone voice. "And I nearly killed the people who I care for the most in life."

Ness could only stare at Luigi in silence.

"I think we better revive these guys so far!" Kirby cried out, rather unnerved by Dedede's over-friendly attitude.

"Oh yeah," Dedede agreed. "But remember that they only gonna get revived 'cos yours truly had the foresight to stop us bein' trophified in the first place."

Because he knew him best, Dedede decided to revive Meta Knight first, the mysterious masked warrior of Dreamland. Meta Knight, upon revival, blinked in surprise but, to Dedede's even greater surprise, he was suddenly slammed into a subspace wall by the knight in question.

"H-hey! You ungrateful knight! I just revived you!"

"I had everything under control with the Halberd until you decided to step in," Meta Knight said coldly. "I would have been quite capable of fending off Tabuu's Subspace Army if you hadn't decided to attack at the same time. I would have forced the being to flee and it would not have used my ship for enlarging its army no thanks to you."

"OK, OK." Dedede put his hands up. "Bad move on my part but it was an honest mistake. I was just tryin' to get information on the low-life since I knew what a threat it would be. An' I thought your ship would be a great tool in helpin' that. An' besides, my badges did revive these guys," pointing to Luigi, Ness and Kirby, "so I had a back-up plan."

Meta Knight let go of the penguin king. "Very well. Though you could not have timed your approach any worse. You do have a habit of doing this you know. You ought to work on your PR better."

"Oh, it's tough bein' a king," Dedede sighed.

"Never mind. We better just revive these other guys now!" Kirby declared.

"Oh, hey, it's the fat, garlic-smelling guy," Dedede said.

As Dedede wandered over to the Wario trophy, Luigi stared into the distance.

 _I need to talk to Mario about this. I don't want to be alone…_

* * *

"You know Dedede has tried asking me out a couple of times?" Jigglypuff said conversationally.

"Seriously?" said Luigi from the comfort of the Quiet Room sofa. "I don't remember you mentioning that before."

"I wasn't quite sure if he was joking with me or not the first time since it was after a bad defeat on my part. Anyway, I said that he's rather too greedy for me not to mention that he hasn't got the best of reputations."

"You like Kirby," Luigi pointed out, "and let's be honest, Kirby can be greedy. I mean, this is a puffball who can eat a cake about the size of Master Hand on his own and still say that he needs something else to finish it off."

"That's different," said Jigglypuff reddening.

"And don't you like Meta Knight as well?"

"He's mature, he's wise and he's so cool. It really is difficult choosing between the two," Jigglypuff opined. "I'm really still not sure what to do. Have you any ideas?"

Luigi gave a snort. "Jigglypuff, you know I'm one of the last people to ask about relationship advice and this is coming from someone who keeps telling Mario to get with Peach already like everyone else is also saying. Captain Falcon is supposed to be good at this kind of stuff, mind, so ask him."

"Alright then. Hey, are you feeling better?"

"I'm not too bad. Give me five more minutes and I'll be fully compos mentis."

"You do seem better overall than the last tournament that's for sure."

Luigi shrugged. "Me and Mario have talked since then."

* * *

Dedede, with more than a little smugness and glee, revived Wario, who nearly matched him in the weight department.

"So the trophy hunter also got trophified, eh?" Dedede grinned.

"Not my fault," Wario grumbled. "And how come you've got my prizes wandering about there? You thief!"

As Wario and Dedede descended into a full-scale argument, Ness continued to gape at his fellow Smasher.

"When you say the entire universe, do you mean, like, all our worlds and everyone on them?"

"Yeah. Or rather, the entire multiverse. Nothing. Kablooey. Gone. It might have been recreated in the image of a certain jester. He took an interest in me alright. Hahahahaha."

Ness was silent. Somehow, this sounded worse than Giygas and that had been terrifying enough. But at least he hadn't been possessed or anything which is what this sounded like.

Luigi trod silently after King Dedede, Bowser, Wario and Kirby once the argument had ended by way of Kirby's hammer. He knew he had to move on. In his heart, he knew that there was nothing that he had could have done to prevent what had happened to him. At least he had helped find the last Pure Heart and led the storm into Castle Bleck, feeling the urgent need to contribute to the last part of the quest. He knew its ins and outs even if he couldn't quite figure out why at the time. And he had defeated Dimentio, that powerful magician, all by himself without the slightest help. And with the Pure Hearts, he was technically a Hero of Light. That had to count for something.

"Things will get better," Ness promised Luigi. "I'm sure of it. When all this sorted, you should focus on the problem and move on from it. Mom does psychology and she says that it doesn't do you any good brooding on these things."

"Yeah, I know," Luigi said. Taking advice from a kid, whatever next? "It'll just take some time."

"That's the spirit," said Ness. "Now we better make sure these guys don't start fighting again, OK?"

"Mmm."

The group got to a safe area and began reviving all the trophies they had collected, knowing that they hadn't missed a single one.

 _I wonder where Jigglypuff is?_ Luigi thought briefly. _Maybe she didn't get through the portal at all. Probably just as well considering what's going on here._

Luigi touched the base of Mario's trophy. It flashed and in a blink of an eye, Mario was sprawled on the ground feeling somewhat groggy.

"Mamma mia, I hate being trophified," he mumbled. "Oh, Luigi!" he said with relief. "Where have you been all this time?"

Luigi quietly explained what had happened to him, aware that Ness was still standing there and finding at this point, that he didn't really care.

"I'm sorry, bro," said Mario. "I thought you were right behind us but then something strange happened when we entered the portal and the next thing I knew, I was fighting Kirby with Peach and Zelda watching us and then I got blasted off the stage and met up with Pit."

"At least you managed to get on with things," Luigi said dully. "As soon as I got here, what happened? I got trophified. I just feel so useless after… you know..."

"Luigi," said Mario solemnly, holding his brother's shoulder, "I don't quite know how we'll manage it, but we'll get through it somehow. Dimentio could have picked anyone for his prophecies; you were just so unfortunate to be picked by him."

"But..."

"Luigi. I know you keep beating yourself up over it but at that point, we were overwhelmed and you had been trapped. I wish I could have done things differently to prevent that from happening. Tippi was extremely worried about you, I know that. She thought that you… well, I knew otherwise anyway. I'd have known if anything like that had happened. I know it was an extremely close run thing but… we did manage to beat it in the end. And you were a Hero of Light as well, letting the Pure Hearts use their full power. And, bro… what if your presence actually stopped Dimentio from becoming even more powerful?"

"You know that he changed forms only because of me and the Chaos Heart," Luigi said bitterly.

"But how do you know that the fact of being a Hero of Light didn't weaken him?" said Mario. "I can say it now because at the time, I was honestly terrified, but looking back now, that battle wasn't as hard as say, against the Elder Shroob Princess or the Dark Star was it? Thankfully so. The stars were looking down on us that time, little bro."

Luigi said nothing. He looked deep in thought.

"Right now, we've got to stop this world from being destroyed by this Tabuu. And I know you can get through this because once you're focussed on something, you can't be stopped. And I'm not just saying that," he added before Luigi could protest, "I believe that. You'll let me believe that won't you?"

"I guess so..."

"Then it's not too much of a stretch to believe it yourself."

Despite himself, a ghost of a smile appeared on Luigi's face.

"Ready, bro?" said Mario.

"I'm as ready as I'll ever be, Mario."

* * *

"So then you went through the Great Maze?" Jigglypuff confirmed.

"Yeah. All the areas that we had seen in the Smash World were brought together for this maze and everyone had to go through it and beat our subspacial clones not to mention bosses like Duon, Galleom and Rayquaza."

"And Rayquaza can be pretty brutal back on my world," Jigglypuff shivered.

"According to Diddy Kong, it wasn't actually too bad," Luigi said. He had managed to sit up by now though his head was still throbbing a little. "Though some of our clones put up a hefty fight. Like my clone."

"And you fought it didn't you?"

"Yep," Luigi sighed. "Just my luck. Maybe that was the kind of thing Mario fought when I was Mr. L. Sorry, I shouldn't keep bringing that up."

"It's understandable."

"Well, OK. But yeah, my clone kept spinning into me and once or twice, tried to pull off a Super Jump Punch. Luckily for me, a Beam Sword landed just by me so I was able to use that to defeat my clone."

"Whereas I didn't even have a clone because I wasn't anywhere nearby," Jigglypuff lamented.

"Neither was Toon Link, Wolf or Sonic and he only came in at the last possible moment, goodness knows how. And I might have been wandering about for ages if Dedede hadn't made the jump on me. You were just unlucky or lucky as the case might be, to be caught at the Swamp."

"I think they were possibly Cruel Primids or something," Jigglypuff grumbled. "I've no idea what they were planning to do. I assume I would have managed to get free at some point even without help but until then, I admit that I was somewhat unnerved."

"You mean frightened."

"Oh, alright then," Jigglypuff rolled her eyes. "But it wasn't a pleasant experience I can assure you."

* * *

"FOR THE LAST TIME, I AM NOT SOMETHING TO BE COOKED!"

Jigglypuff wondered how on earth she had got into this situation, surrounded by monsters and dangling over a cooking pot. One of the Primids seemed to be arguing with a Glire to get the thing lit already and start the stew bubbling.

"This would really be an undignified way to go," Jigglypuff muttered to herself.

She tried undoing the knots but this proved rather difficult when one was upside down and didn't have the arms to even reach said knots anyway.

"You don't want to eat me!" she cried out loud. "I taste horrible. Really horrible. So… if you would just set me free and… for crying out loud, they are not doing a dance around the pot are they? Wonderful."

It was quite clear that polite conversation was going nowhere. It also didn't help that the stew in the pot actually smelt quite tasty.

Jigglypuff pondered over what to do for the next minute before an idea hit her. Of course. It worked every time.

" _~Jigggggaaaalypuuuuff, Jigga-lyyyyyyy-alyyyyy-puuuuufff~"_

The monsters blinked, wondering what their meal was doing. Then they proceeded to get the fire going.

"OH, COME ON!"

* * *

"The one time I really needed the lullaby to work and it utterly failed," Jigglypuff sighed, "which is pretty typical really."

"Always the case isn't it?" said Luigi.

"Yep," said Jigglypuff. "But I suppose you guys had it tougher. So it took you all ages to get through the Great Maze and then-"

* * *

"Foolish mortals. You think that you could beat one such as I?"

The gathered Smashers gritted their teeth. They had finally managed to get through the Great Maze only to find Tabuu waiting for them. As soon as they had re-entered Tabuu's chamber, he summoned an enormous Subspace army against them ensuring that there was no possible way they could all attack him. However, thanks to a miraculous stroke of luck in the form of a speedy blue hedgehog, Tabuu had been greatly weakened by having his wings broken. He could no longer turn them all into trophies at once. But of course, he was still a force to be reckoned with.

"Had you planned for that, penguin?" Bowser grumbled. "If it had decided to trophify us all again?"

"Uhhh…"

There was little time to talk though. The Smashers had to assemble to take down the dark forces while a crack team directly dealt with Tabuu.

Mario hesitated when Link declared that he and Luigi ought to be part of the force taking down Tabuu owing to their battling experiences and having dealt with far worse than this. He wasn't entirely sure if his brother could cope with this. Perhaps it would be better if he helped take down the swarms of Auroros, Bucculus, Glice, Glire, Glunder, Shaydas and more.

Luigi looked pale and thin, made worse by the half-light that illuminated Subspace. Mario knew it would be a long time before he recovered fully from their last adventure (if, Mario thought with a cold feeling in his stomach, he ever did). But he knew that Luigi needed his brother beside him now. He probably could cope with defeating the swarms outside; with his mental state, it would probably be the better option indeed. And yet, despite the possible tactical fallacy, Mario felt it better for Luigi to stay with him. And though Luigi wouldn't believe it, he really was one of their best fighters. Who else could pull off a meteor smash with just a simple kick for goodness sake?

Luigi drew a deep breath and nodded in solemn agreement. It was time.

Sonic, being in more or less full health, took the first charge against Tabuu while Meta Knight, Samus, Link, Mario and Luigi waited in the wings ready to attack as soon as possible. (Kirby would have liked to have been part of the team as well having beaten many an Eldritch Abomination before though he had been convinced that he would serve better guiding the others in beating back the Subspace Army and keeping an eye on villains like Ganondorf and Wario.) They would have all attacked at once, of course, but a force field blocked their way allowing only two Smashers in at once.

"Wanted to take over the world, huh?" Sonic smirked. "Exactly like a big-time villain. Well, I'll show you!"

"Let's just get this over with," said Samus.

Sonic wasted no time in throwing the gauntlet down against Tabuu. He used several homing attacks and kicked Tabuu in the side for good measure causing the creature to screech. Sonic soon realised though that he had a problem against Tabuu, mainly that because Tabuu often teleported about and stayed more or less in the air, it was hard for Sonic to land many hits against him despite his speed.

With Sonic distracting Tabuu, Samus used the time to charge up her Plasma Beam, managing to blast the foe with one lucky shot. Tabuu eyed them and zapped both with a series of needle-sized bolts that hurt like hell. At moments like these, Samus was extremely grateful for her Power Suit.

She aimed several missiles though Tabuu often vanished before they could strike. He swooped down in a motion similar to Ridley and battered Sonic to one side, just missing Samus. Give her Ridley any day.

Despite not having any long-range moves at his disposal, Samus was impressed by Sonic's physical onslaught against the enemy, putting the boot in whenever he had the opportunity. Samus launched into a Screw Attack when Tabuu mistakenly reappeared right above her. She was prevented form doing so again though when it surrounded its body with a series of sparking orbs.

Sonic was fast; however, he wasn't fast enough to avoid the nigh-on predictable insta-kill wave attack from Tabuu that sent a very surprised Sonic flying off the stage quicker than he had arrived in it. Samus too, was caught in the blast and simply had no chance.

"Oh, mamma mia," Mario muttered. "This guy's gonna be a nightmare if he took out Sonic and Samus like that."

Luigi gulped. He felt like running away. Perhaps he would have if his legs didn't feel frozen to the spot.

Meta Knight and Link went next. The Star Warrior expertly slashed at Tabuu's glowing blue body. He used his dimensional cape to avoid the lasers that shot from Tabuu's eyes and performed a series of sword flurries. One time, Tabuu streaked across the stage shaped almost like a mini Halberd and delivered some serious damage against Meta Knight.

Link, determined not to have his swordmanship shown up by Meta Knight, clashed against Tabuu and swung his sword mightily with the aim of causing as much damage as possible for this was no time for theatrics.

Tabuu sent a number of electrical orbs that burst directly in their faces throwing both warriors backwards. Meta Knight was back on his feet quicker than Link and proceeded to stab Tabuu in the leg. This was nowhere near enough to finish the creature and with a single swipe, it slammed Meta Knight into the solid stage. Link flicked his normally-strong Boomerang against Tabuu before following up with a Bomb. Tabuu gave a sinister laugh however, and used a boomerang far more deadly than Link's and bigger than Link himself. It violently slammed into the Hero of Time and knocked him off stage forcing Link to use a Spin Attack in order to grab the very edge of the platform.

"This one will not go down easily," Meta Knight muttered. Tabuu barely seemed to take any damage even from Galaxia. But by now, it must have been weakening. All forces went down in the end.

Meta Knight was resilient and kept up his ferocious pattern of attacks, using his Sword Drill in an attempt to pierce the abomination's defence. Tabuu, however, saw his chance and brought out a golden whip, catching Meta Knight within its grip. Meta Knight tried to untangle himself but he was instantly swung up in the air and whipped around even as Link pelted Tabuu with bombs and arrows.

Meta Knight should have soared off into the distance but he grimly hung on, refusing to be vanquished by such an opponent. He was quite sure that he and his partner had whittled down much of its energy. He wanted to land the final blow. But Tabuu denied Meta Knight this by closing his damaged wings and preparing another insta-kill move that both warriors failed to avoid.

"This is insane..." Luigi croaked. "What if we fail too, bro?"

"The other Smashers will come in and continue the battle until Tabuu is defeated," Mario said quickly. "They'll know if they need to. They have to know."

The brothers touched down into the battlefield and faced their deadly opponent. Judging by the way Tabuu was breathing, they could only assume that the previous teams had managed to land some serious blows upon the creature. Mario let fire course his hands and charged forwards yelling an incomprehensible battle-cry.

"If it uses that wave move again, we are doomed!" Luigi shouted, his voice cracked with real fear.

"Better defeat it before it does!" Mario shouted back. "But there must be a way to dodge it! There has to be!"

Mario and Luigi focussed their attention on avoiding Tabuu's next attack sequence, keeping just above a terrible, ferocious laser that spammed the entire stage. Luigi dashed forwards and threw a couple of punches but no more than that as Tabuu vanished on the spot. It reappeared behind Mario.

"Bro, behind you!" Luigi screamed.

Mario turned around but was immediately sent sprawling. He used his cape to block an orb from hitting him and retreated to a safer distance. Luigi lit up a green fireball. He found himself shivering.

 _Focus, Luigi,_ the green-hatted hero told himself. Y _ou've got to put a stop to this. Just focus on this._

Tabuu hissed, feeling hot flames burning it side. Luigi caught a glancing blow when Tabuu teleported from place to place, causing the air to explode around it each time. Luigi struck back with a Green Missile and saw Tabuu's pupilless eyes widen with shock upon being hit by such a strange move.

Several coins flew out of Tabuu once Mario was able to slip past its defences and use his classic jump move. Luigi leapt and used his Luigi Cyclone to batter every inch possible of the creature. Both brothers used their shields when Tabuu retaliated with minor moves and were careful to avoid the vicious moves that had caught the previous teams before.

"More fire, Luigi!" Mario cried out as he let searing heat cover his palms. "It's almost down! We can do it!"

Luigi obliged and sent a barrage of green flame coursing through the air into the terrible creature's body surely causing major agony. Indeed it screamed and violently attacked the brothers with nearly every move in its arsenal.

Mario panted for breath. "Wonder how the others are doing?"

"Should be OK," Luigi gasped. "Wonder where Link and the others ended up?"

"Probably where Kirby and the others are."

Tabuu, in its one-winged angel form, levitating a safe distance from the ground, glared at its enemies in a manner too incomprehensible, too horrible to describe. It began to charge up its most devastating attack again. The brother's eyes widened.

"Not again," Mario croaked. "We can't stand that. No-one can."

Luigi thought quickly. "I think if we dodge just before the last wave hits us, we should make it. We need exact timing. Ready?!"

Despite only having a couple of seconds pass, it felt like an age to Mario and Luigi. The brothers stood their ground, focussed their attention on the waves to the near-blurring of everything else, and waited for their single chance. The first two waves sent pain coursing through their bodies. Luigi felt his heart banging against his ribcage and wondered if Mario felt the same. The last wave approached.

With almost instantaneous timing, the brothers slipped to one side, hoping against hope that they could avoid this and then finish off Tabuu once and for all because if not… well, there were no continues.

Unbelievably, the wave went by.

A lesser fighter would have stood there in shock, having evaded what others did not. Mario and Luigi, however, after the briefest exchange of amazed looks, charged forwards to keep up their bombardment of attacks. Tabuu, not expecting this at all, took the full blow and could not whip up a powerful halberd or laser quick enough.

Both brothers landed a powerful strike. Suddenly, without warning, Tabuu recoiled from the blow. It shook and much to the brothers' alarm and relief, it began to implode.

They shielded their eyes from the bright light that assaulted them, threatening to burn them. A powerful gale blew at their feet, threatening to cast them away. They held their ground more firmly and wondered what was to happen next…

* * *

"And all the subspace vanished," said Luigi. "We all ended up together on these cliffs and we could see the Smash World repairing itself. Although the R.O.B factory had taken way too much damage. The R.O.B we have here is the last of its kind I believe."

"When you defeated that Tabuu, all the monsters vanished as well," said Jigglypuff, "so I was saved from being cooked at least. But it would still have been a pain finding the Smash Mansion if the search parties hadn't been sent out. Goodness, I hope that kind of thing never happens again."

"I think Master Hand is taking severe precautions against that. I hope it doesn't affect him though."

"We'll just have to see. Are you feeling better now by the way? We should probably get going."

Luigi lifted his legs off the sofa and stood up. "Yeah, I think it's worn off now. Let's get back to the Mansion."

"You know," said Jigglypuff, as they waved to Brewster and exited the café, "we never did find out where that Tabuu came from or what it really was did we?"

"We didn't," Luigi confirmed. "There's a lot of things that will stay a mystery to us I guess. But we just have to deal with them one at a time."

"That is true. And now, onwards to the new tournament!"


	4. Chapter 4

**Coffee Morning Reminiscence: Part 4**

As they walked back to the Smash Mansion, Luigi and Jigglypuff noticed that the town was already full with visitors, all eagerly waiting to see the matches live and desperately hoping that they got the best seats or that the best seats somehow remained free so they could nip over to them instead. Many of them noticed Luigi and Jigglypuff who had the distinction of being among the Original Smashers as well as being what were known to laymen as 'Secret Keepers' which, for Luigi and Jigglypuff, meant they were privy to the inner workings and knowledge of the Smash Tournaments and also had responsibilities relating to said position.

Because of the length of time they had been 'Secret Keepers' as it were, consistently through the tournaments, Luigi and Jigglypuff also knew more of what was going on than the rest of the Smashers usually and were practically designated Chief Secret Keepers. However, both were taking a break from it this time round.

"Year of Luigi?" Jigglypuff asked with a smirk when a visitor shuffled up to Luigi and shyly asked for his autograph in recognition of his achievements.

"Yeah." Luigi flushed with embarrassment but there was no denying that he was proud of this recognition. He signed the scrap of paper and the visitor bounced away delighted. "I mean technically it's ended now but it's just been this thing where people have started to recognise me since we're not called Super Mario Bros. for nothing. So I've been doing quite a bit of work revolving around that and helping Professor E. Gadd out at the same time so things have been very busy. And truth be told, I just want to be able to relax a little more at this tournament if such a thing is possible."

"I know what you mean," said Jigglypuff, "and since I've been doing work for Guildmaster Wigglytuff, I've decided to step back a little here too because I'm going to be very busy when I get back to my world in training new recruits and all that, helping out with this conquest thing, ask me about it later. I'll help out every now and then I think but I do think it is time for someone else to hold the reins as it were."

"Any ideas who?"

"I'm not too sure, especially as there are so many Smashers this time. And I don't think they're all going to be joining from the beginning. I hear there's going to be some strange fighter from a completely different dimension where they are all very obsessed with combos or something."

"That person will have fun here then," Luigi smirked. "Just wait for them to get to grips with the stages, especially Pac-Land."

"I still can't believe Pac-Man's coming to our tournament," said Jigglypuff.

"He and Mr Game and Watch should get along very well, especially if they start reminiscing about the good old days or whatever the good old days are supposed to be. He'll probably have a chat with my bro about adventuring and the like as well. He's a pretty nice guy. He'll probably want to discuss ghost-hunting with me though." Luigi sighed and rolled his eyes.

"To think that we knew about Pac-Man ages before anyone else though," Jigglypuff smiled. "I think Master Hand's still going to depend on us a lot. It seems strange that he chose us in the first place though to be secret keepers."

"Aha, I remember Master Hand's words," said Luigi drily.

* * *

"OK, I'm choosing you four to be secret keepers or secret Smashers or whatever because you will be the overlooked types, rarely questioned, rarely considered, hopefully won't let success go to your heads and because goddammit, I've got to pick somebody to help lighten the workload a little. I can't really depend on Crazy Hand whom I've sent on a trip anyway so he won't accidentally destroy the stuff I've just created."

 _Way to boost confidence,_ Luigi thought dully. _Why can't I be more like Mario? Why can't I just stop feeling afraid of everything and be brave like him? Maybe that would help. But I seriously doubt it._ Brother to a world-famous hero and he was considered the overlooked type. Wonderful.

"Crazy Hand, in case you're wondering, is my brother, the other side to me, whichever you want to pick. I'm the creative personification, he's the destructive personification. He won't be around the first tournament because I want everything settled in first."

 _Floating hands,_ thought Jigglypuff. _That's just so weird. Then again, we have some pretty weird Pokémon back at home so I guess I can't comment on it too much._

"You might be temporary," Master Hand continued, "it depends on a number of factors including on how I'm feeling and issues to do with recognisability and reliability. I mean, Ness, for example," The psychic boy looked up feeling rather worried, "I've a feeling that your little adventure will become very well-known in the future even if it seems somewhat neglected at the moment despite its intriguing setting, so your secret keeper position will be a temporary one for this tournament. Captain Falcon, you're not really the hero type per se but you'll probably become popular because of perceived coolness or whatever so again, you might be temporary. Doesn't mean that you two can shirk your duties though by which I am going to send details once I've compiled my lists. You may also go now."

 _Pfft. Overlooked type,_ Captain Falcon inwardly grumbled. _I'll make sure the fans remember me. Just wait until they get a hold of my Falcon Punch!_

 _I guess people don't know about me much,_ Ness thought. _I hope people will get to know me in the future though. It would be nice for others to know of my adventure, especially considering how weird it is._

"So what about us?" Jigglypuff asked when Ness and Captain Falcon left, feeling both honoured to be chosen for such a task and miffed at the implications that they were basically thought of at the last minute and were required only to take up some of Master Hand's workload to make sure that he didn't do everything himself. "Did you choose us because we're basically outsiders and no-one will really give a damn about us?"

"I chose you two," Master Hand intoned, "because you both have hidden depths."

* * *

"Nice of him to say that really," said Jigglypuff. "He's not as scary as people think he is unless he's drowning in paperwork and administration. I was kind of thinking about what he had said for days."

"The One-Hit KO experts, the people in the back scenes doing the organising, the ones who prompt others to further better themselves; that's us alright," said Luigi with a smile of satisfaction. "It's going to be a great tournament I think."

"You reckon nothing will go wrong?"

Luigi hesitated. "Something will probably go wrong somewhere. And some of us will have to sort it out. But that wouldn't be entirely unexpected. Just look at the time when Bowser blew up the bathroom in trying to make explosives. Mamma mia, now that Bowser Jr. and the Koopalings are with us, we'll have to watch out that the whole Mansion isn't blown up."

"You guys sure have a lot of representatives in this tournament," Jigglypuff felt compelled to say. "Others might get jealous."

"Well, the Koopalings are under the same roster place as Bowser Jr. for whatever reason and Yoshi and Wario represent their own series technically. Most don't have a great deal of representatives to choose from anyway although I think Anna from the Fire Emblem lot would be an obvious addition; I'm surprised she's not come here yet. And maybe Viridi alongside Pit and Palutena. Better than Dark Pit anyway since he's just acting as a clone. I seriously wish we didn't have clones."

"Tell me about it" said Jigglypuff, knowing that Luigi was challenging her to point out that he was technically a clone once. "Especially when we have so many Smashers this time round. I think Master Hand might have bitten off more than he can chew."

* * *

They always wanted more than he could provide. When he provided them with what they wanted, it was never enough. He was but one being. What more did they want?

"Seriously!" Master Hand erupted. "I can't take anymore! There are far too many requests for me to deal with! I want this! I want this! Why can't you people be satisfied for once?! And for goodness sake, at least do me the courtesy of sending me some proper requests! Who the hell is this green ogre guy? Is he a video game guy? NO! I WON'T PUT UP WITH THIS!"

"Yo, bro!" Crazy Hand cheered as he wandered without permission into Master Hand's office. "I'm making potatoes that extract sunlight and I'm getting a pink cat and- WHUMPH!"

"Just burn every one of these papers for me," Master Hand ordered as Crazy Hand staggered under the weight of the towering memos. "I've got enough to be dealing with without being disturbed. Now go away and if you're good, I'll get you a lollipop."

Master Hand groaned as Crazy Hand scuttled out of sight. His palm itched. That business from the last tournament, those Shadow bugs, were still plaguing him. When Tabuu had him brought under heel. It hurt more than he would dare admit. The primal darkness had not entirely disappeared. He had to stop the possibility of infecting the world, his world, again.

Something would give. Something had to give.

He floated over to the cabinet and thought desperately. He opened a drawer and pulled out a perfectly formed, darkening orb.

He needed it away for good. It wasn't going to go away on its own. It needed to be broken, shattered, destroyed. It would help him, cleanse him even.

He closed his fist around it.

* * *

"Hey, bro, I wondered where you got to," Mario said once Luigi and Jigglypuff walked through the Smash Mansion doors. "Nice to see you too, Jigglypuff." The Pokémon gave a wave of acknowledgement.

"Had some Mr Saturn coffee at Brewster's," Luigi shrugged. "Not intentional mind."

"Oh, right. Anyway, Pac-Man, remember my little bro, Luigi? He's been a Secret Keeper here since the beginning but he's taking a break from it this time round. And this is Jigglypuff, a Pokémon from the Pokémon world who's also been with us since the start."

"Wait, what?" Jigglypuff exclaimed. "It sounds like you guys already know each other! Why wasn't I informed of this before?"

"Oh, yeah," Luigi replied, "Pac-Man joined us for a couple of kart tournaments as a special guest. And brought over some of the ghosts as well who, of course, escaped for a while. E. Gadd's pretty glad to have something new to study by the way. He's thinking of improving his ghost jacket based on his observations."

"Excellent," said Pac-Man. "Always glad to help out a fellow ghost-hunter. You'll have to tell me what you've been up on that scene." Luigi couldn't quite hide his grimace at that. "Anyway, I'm glad to meet you, Jigglypuff. I'll also be glad to get to know everybody else here as well and try to get back on my game. Mario's been giving me some advice on how to get back to the big-time again."

"Differentiation," Mario explained. "I said about getting into some new adventures and breaking free from the whole maze thing because while a lot of people complain if things stay the same, they also complain if things don't actually change. So yeah, new adventures and stories but of course still having the ghosts, power-ups and whole waka-waka motions. Good design is also really important. And also staying away from the cartoons."

"That was a low-point in my career," Pac-Man admitted. "Though I was not responsible for the designs. Still, I'm going to get a cool movie role so I have that to look forward to."

"Our designs were fine but our people toned down certain things to make them suitable for kids," Jigglypuff inputted. "Otherwise, they'd be accused of being a moral disgrace. Of course, they were then accused of needlessly toning things down for the kids. Talk about a conundrum."

"At least ours has had some memetic value," Mario shrugged. "Though if we watched them, we'd die of embarrassment. That rapping one was one of the absolute worse. And the film. Especially the film; you and your fellow Pokémon have got that so much better. I also said that you want to avoid at all costs what we in the business call an '06'."

"I heard that," Sonic muttered from the corner.

"Or a 'boom job'," Mario added, twisting the knife even further. "Because you know Sonic, testing is really vital."

"Of course we tested!"

"Right," Mario sniggered, "and those glitches were a figment of my imagination. And you didn't get involved in this dreams collection business either. Oh, don't think I haven't seen that," he added as Sonic's eyes widened. "That is some seriously messed-up stuff, rival of mine, though I realise you didn't have much choice in the matter. Take my advice and leave the dreams business to Kirby; he is from Dream Land after all. Oh, yeah, and us come to think of it. Did you play Dream Team Bros.? We're pretty good at the RPG stuff."

"And I suppose I should stay away from princesses as well?" Sonic drawled.

"HELL, YES!" they all shouted. It was something that the Smash Mansion unanimously agreed on. Princesses were best left to the likes of the Mario Bros., Link and the actual princesses themselves, Peach and Zelda.

"I don't know which was most disturbing," Mario continued, "that she kissed an animal or a corpse or the fact you could just about see Eggman's eyes behind those shades." It was a continuing debate. The idea of Eggman without his shades was just plain _wrong._

"You'd had people of different species kiss you!" Sonic yelled, enraged.

"Alright, you've got me there. But at least I was alive at that point and in our world, the species thing isn't that much of an issue. Unfortunately, it is on yours. And that boom cartoon-"

"I am seriously gonna take tighter control over that," Sonic declared. "You know what? I think I'll sort that out now. And by the way, Mario, you are the first person I am going to seriously KO on the battlefield."

"He'll forgive me," Mario shrugged once Sonic left under a cloud. "He always does because he knows he's never going to quite match me and that's a view others have put forward, not me. Anyway, Luigi, I'd love to stay and chat but I promised that I would finish drawing up these plans for Pac-Man and then we'll go grab something to eat, OK?"

Luigi and Jigglypuff waved Mario and Pac-Man off after agreeing to met in the restaurant later for 6:00PM and decided that now would be a good time to check out the games room. There were some seriously good retro games to be had in there. Some terrible ones too but at least you could have a laugh in completely mocking them. No sooner had they thought that however, there was someone shouting for them.

"HELP! WE NEED HELP! SERIOUS HELP!"

"Never a dull moment," Jigglypuff smiled as a figure dashed towards them. It wore a red T-shirt and shorts and trailed a bug net. For a split-second she thought it was a Bug-Catcher Trainer. But then it was the shorts. They were comfy and easy to wear no doubt.

"OK," Luigi said smoothly, "what's the problem?"

"Well, you know the, er, floating hand in this place-"

"Master Hand," the classic Smashers intoned.

"Er, yeah, well, it seems to have gone a little crazy and turned into some weird abomination. The power suit person told me that it's taken refuge deep in the Classic Area and we need some really strong fighters to take it on. The battle area looks like a volcano's erupted and everything."

"Huh, going crazy is Crazy Hand's business," Luigi muttered, "but I know for a fact that he's busy setting up his own challenges now that's he's finally been given more responsibility. Well, let's go then. By the way," Luigi whispered once the boy had run off, "that Villager really creeps Mario out. It's just something about his eyes apparently. And we've got him coming over for our next kart tournament along with Link. Mario doesn't want to think that Villager's out to get him in any way but..."

The Smashers made their way to the Classic Area where a number of Smashers congregated. Through the whirling vortex before them, they could see a devastated, blackened landscape with lava rivers coursing around the outskirts and lightning illuminating the dark skies when they did not see flames spiralling across the atmosphere. It was a harsh environment, a deadly place to set foot even for the most experienced of adventurers.

R.O.B. rolled forwards to the latecomers.

" _I have calculated,"_ he said in his monotone voice, _"that Master Hand has been infected by the shadow bug crisis that occurred during the last tournament when Tabuu tried to take over this world. Master Hand thought that he would be able to overcome this but even he has his limits and it has corrupted him to the point of what I deem to be 'Master Core'. I fear there will be additional forms to destroy should you manage to succeed against Master Core."_

Luigi and Jigglypuff then noticed some defeated Smashers being dragged over to the Medic Centre, moaning about its forms being terrifying, destructive forces that surely came from the bowels of hell. Luigi gulped and then he thought that he had dealt with far worse.

" _They tried to beat the Smasher Clones that inhabit this clone and they may well have reached Master Core but he obviously proved too much for them. Master Core must be defeated. Will you now take up the challenge and save us from this latest calamity?"_

Luigi and Jigglypuff exchanged brief grins.

"Nothing like defeating a corrupted monster to keep us on our toes," Jigglypuff smirked.

"I'm feeling up to the challenge," said Luigi. "Not that have we much choice. Are you ready, Jigglypuff?"

"Oh, you bet I am, Luigi."

Luigi and Jigglypuff gave each other a nod of determination and shared confidence and without further ado, stepped into the void with the powerful feeling that they would be the ones to defeat Master Core.

* * *

 **When I get round to Super Smash Bros. again, I too will defeat Level 9 Master Core! Or more technically, Master Fortress. I nearly did once but I couldn't find that last orb and then I got battered. Seriously.**

 **Anyway, thanks for reading!**


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